Smokescreen by icd
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Chapter or Story 
Chapter or Story
Disclaimer: see part one
~~~~~~~
Smokescreen
Part 9
An extended stay
They had been sitting there on the ledge, side by side, for over an hour without anyone speaking and hardly moving when Jay finally looked up.
He was watching Jarod from the side. Jarod was aware of it but he chose to ignore it as long as Jay didn’t say anything.
The boy breathed deeply. “It’s really sad that we’ll have to go soon and that we can’t stay out here overnight,” he said regretfully.
Jarod looked at him. “We can, but I suggest we move up a bit further because there’s a small cave up there that provides more space,” he replied.
Jay looked at him in bewilderment. “It will get rather cold tonight.”
Jarod pattered the bag that was sitting besides him and grinned. “Also not a problem. I have two sleeping bags here.”
Jay just gaped at him. After a few moments he recovered. “You planned this rather thoughtfully, didn’t you?”
“Yes, as a matter of fact, I did,” Jarod grinned openly.
Jay nodded. “Wait, how do you know that there is a cave up there? You didn’t come here yesterday to check it out, did you?”
“No, I didn’t,” Jarod chuckled. “I have already been here before. About two and a half years ago I came here with a friend of mine and we went climbing. We didn’t need the cave back then but it stuck me as useful,” he paused. “It turns out that I was right with that.”
Jay grinned. “Yes, it looks like it. How far up is that?”
“About another ten or fifteen meters. I don’t really remember,” Jarod replied thoughtfully.
Jay nodded. “Ok.”
Jarod looked at his young companion and saw something in the boy’s eyes; a question was lingering at the edge of Jay’s mind. He didn’t press but waited for Jay to speak up.
“How about… I mean… maybe,” Jay stuttered.
“What?” Jarod asked, grinning.
“Could I try to lead?” Jay asked carefully.
Jarod quirked an eyebrow. “You think you could handle it? Do you feel safe enough to do it?”
Jay nodded slowly. “Do you think I will be able to do that?”
Jarod shrugged. “From what I saw earlier, you got a good grip in the wall. You made some real good moves even when you had gotten yourself into difficult positions. If you want to try,” he held up his hands, indicating that he wouldn’t hold Jay back.
Jay’s face lit up. “I would like to.”
“Ok. There’s not much that could happen if you stick to some basics. If you lose your footage and fall, your fall will - of course - be stopped by the rope but you might fall a short distance contrary to when you go second,” Jarod explained.
Jay nodded once more. “Ok.”
“You will have to pay attention to what you are doing more than before when you followed me but you will see that for yourself in the wall. It’s a different climb; you are more alert because the danger of falling is more immanent. At least that’s what I experienced,” Jarod told him.
Jay listened closely and waited for Jarod to go on.
“I will give you some more quickdraws. You will have to put them into the rings that are already fastened in the rock like you saw me doing it. You need to pay attention to how you put them into the wall,” Jarod said earnestly. He continued explaining some more basic rules to Jay so that the young man would be safe.
After a while, Jarod stopped and smiled at Jay. “Still interested in leading?”
“Yes,” Jay said, though slightly less enthusiastic than before.
Jarod smiled. “You’ll do just fine. Just pay attention to what you’re doing. Once you’re up onto the next ledge, secure yourself with another quickdraw in the bolt there and let me follow, ok?”
“Ok,” Jay nodded again and then looked up the wall that was going straight up from where they were.
“And keep remembering the way you put the rope into the quickdraws. Always coming from beyond you directly on the wall and then into the quickdraw and leading towards you.”
Jay looked over his shoulder at his older self… no brother, he corrected himself, and nodded again.
“Well then, up you go,” Jarod encouraged him, smiling.
It was indeed as Jarod had said, Jay decided while climbing. This was a lot more intense than following someone else up. When leading, you tried every stand and every crack more than once to make sure it was safe to put your hand or foot there. It was always a bit of a gamble to see if you were good enough to put your next move on that point and one felt the risk breathing down your neck more intensely once you were leading even though you were safely secured on the rope.
Once up on the ledge, he clipped himself into the metal ring that was bolted into the rock there and then he called down to Jarod. “Ok, I’m up. You can follow now.”
This time he watched Jarod climbing from above and once more he was fascinated by the man’s elegant and careful movements. His brother knew exactly where he could put his hand and what he would be able to manage. He radiated with a certainty and self-confidence and Jay found himself envying him.
He tried to shake that feeling but it stayed.
Jarod hoisted himself up on the ledge next to Jay and leaned back slightly to secure himself into the ring as well.
“Well done, Jay,” he nodded approvingly.
“Hmm,” Jay replied distractedly.
“What is it?” Jarod asked in a tone that showed that he didn’t want any excuses.
Jay huffed. “It’s just that I can’t help envying your movements.”
“You’re kidding, right?” Jarod asked incredulously.
Jay shook his head, his eyes cast downward. “No, it just looks so graceful when you’re climbing. It’s like you know exactly where to put your next move.”
“Oh, come on Jay. You can’t possibly be envious of me. I have a whole lot more experience than you. You’ve been climbing for the first time today so it’s normal that you’re still searching for the right balance from time to time. Don’t think I started the way I’m able to climb now. Believe me; I’ve had my share of misjudging and placing my trust into the wrong stones. And it’s not like I know where to put my hands before feeling the wall,” he looked at his young companion closely. “I also have to search for the right place to put my next move onto and I have to feel my way around. True, I might be faster than you at the moment but don’t think that it will stay that way. You have talent and if you start doing this more often, you will soon be just as fast as I am. You just mustn’t forget that this is the first time you went climbing. Got it?”
Jay smiled. “Yes, you’re right…,” he sighed. “It just looks so… easy.”
Jarod grinned and shook his head. “Wait until you’ve been climbing a bit more often and then you won’t complain. You’ll beat me in lengths there.”
“Would you… I mean,” he broke of and then started once more. “Would you mind if we went climbing every once in a while?”
Jarod chuckled. “Not at all!”
“That’s great,” Jay replied, a wide grin spreading on his face.
“Ok, how about we get the sleeping bags out and get ourselves stationed,” Jarod suggested.
Jay nodded but then he stopped in his tracks. “What about Marc and Carol? Won’t they be worried?”
“No, they won’t. They know that we might stay away over night,” Jarod informed his young brother.
“You really planned this,” Jay grumbled half-heartedly.
“Only prepared for every possibility,” Jarod countered. They both chuckled heartily and Jay found himself thoroughly enjoying this adventure with his older self… brother. He shook his head and rolled his eyes slightly.
“What?” Jarod grinned when he saw that movement.
“It’s just… I start trying to see you as my brother rather than my older self,” Jay admitted.
Jarod grinned. “Not that easy at first but you will get used to it.”
Jay looked at him closely. “It took you some time as well?”
“Certainly,” Jarod nodded vigorously. “And I didn’t even have you around at that time.”
Jay nodded slowly. “What do we do until it’s dark?”
Jarod pursed his lips. “How about we do a little more climbing? We can leave the things here. There is no way anyone will get up here without climbing and it’s already a bit too late to starting a climbing trip for the day,” they both got up from the floor. “Oh, and we should get ourselves some wood for a little fire, I don’t have that in the bag,” he grinned.
“You can’t conjure it up out of your bag?” Jay bantered back, grinning widely as well.
Jarod looked over to where his bag stood and pretended to think about it for a moment, then he turned back and started to say “yes” when he closed his mouth again. “No,” he huffed theatrically. “No, I don’t think I could.”
Jay laughed openly.
“You know, that’s better,” Jarod grinned and went on explaining what he meant when Jay tilted his head to the side in the same questioning gesture Jarod often did himself, “seeing you laugh and seeing you open up again.”
Jay paused shortly but then he nodded. “I’m glad that you didn’t give up on me. I don’t think that I would have gotten out of that one alone.”
“Maybe, maybe not, but that’s a what-if-case. You’re here now and we are having great fun,” Jarod replied and drew Jay over to him and into a hug. Jay relaxed into the welcoming arms of his big brother. He sighed deeply and leaned his head against Jarod’s shoulder. Jarod rocked them both lightly and put his chin on the boy’s head, finally allowing himself to relax further.
They both retreated reluctantly.
“How about we go climbing now?” Jarod suggested finally.
“Yeah,” Jay breathed deeply. “Thank you, Jarod,” he then added.
“You’re welcome,” Jarod said earnestly. “Come on now.”
~~~~~~~
They went climbing for another three hours in which they succeeded to triumph over some rather difficult routes. When they finally returned to their camp, they were tired both due to the physical - as well as the psychological - strain, so they decided to go to sleep rather early.
Jay was asleep in a matter of minutes, making Jarod smile when he looked over to his young companion.
Even though Jarod was tired, he couldn’t find sleep, so he just let his mind wander.
He silently sighed when he reviewed the events that had occurred that day, the problems they had come here with and the contempt and harmony they had found later.
He was glad that he had finally sought out a confrontation with his brother but even though it had taken him a long time to figure out what Jay’s problems had been, he didn’t want to miss one second he had spent with his younger brother.
Ok, Jay’s words had not always been easy to take, yet they had brought them to where they were now. He had come to see two different, nearly completely contrarian personas in the young man that was his brother; for once strong, independent and then the fragile and dependant character.
Jarod closed his eyes. The climbing tour had been great. Jay had changed during their adventure. What Jarod had seen when Jay had first been in the wall, the contentment in the young man’s eyes had multiplied after their argument. Jay didn’t have to hide his obvious liking in the sport any longer and he showed it openly to Jarod. He easily accepted tips where he could set his foot or hand from his brother and his eyes glowed with a sparkle that hadn’t been there before.
Jarod opened his eyes again when he heard soft sounds coming from where Jay was sleeping.
The boy was trashing around in his sleep, mumbling softly.
Jarod untangled himself from his sleeping bag and crawled over to where the boy was lying.
When Jarod approached him, he could hear the young man’s pleas. “No, please no. Stop. I don’t want that, please, no,” he moved his head from one side to the other in rapid speed and he tried to move his hands as well but in the confined space of the sleeping bag, he didn’t have room to move them. Even though Jarod tried not to, he could easily imagine it only raising the level of the young man’s fear and nightmare.
He quickly closed the remaining distance and then shook Jay’s shoulder rather harshly to get him out of his nightmare as soon as possible. “Jay,” he called out while shaking the young man’s shoulder.
Jay’s head jerked up and, still somewhere between sleep and consciousness, he tried to break free from his dream and tried to move his hands, only to find them restrained in the sleeping bag. He fought against the inhuman force that held him tied while Jarod tried to break through to him.
“Hey, Jay, it’s a nightmare. Come on out of it. You’re safe. I’ve got you,” Jarod tried to get his brother’s attention.
Jay’s eyes flew over to Jarod and after a heartbeat or two, realisation hit in. “Jarod?”
Jarod nodded and zipped the sleeping bag open to make it possible for Jay to move his hands freely. Jay was still shaken and had not completely withdrawn out of the nightmare. Once he felt the fresh air on his arms, he shivered. A sob escaped him and he threw himself at Jarod, who embraced his distraught brother firmly.
“It’s ok. I’ve got you now. You are safe. I’ve got you,” Jarod mumbled into the boy’s hair, drawing him close to his body.
Jay clung to his older brother, listening to the soothing words as well as to his brother’s heartbeat, letting himself be calmed down by both. Slowly getting his breathing back under control, Jay wondered how he had been able to get through his nightmares alone, or how he had been able to send anyone who tried to comfort him away. Marc and Carol had often rushed into his room in the middle of the night and at first he had gladly welcomed their presence but at the same time everything had changed, he had forced Carol and Marc away in the night.
Jarod kept on mumbling soothing words to Jay.
Jay let out a shuddering breath, glad that Jarod was here and that he didn’t have to go through this nightmare and its effects alone.
Jarod drew back a bit but Jay kept a firm grasp on his older brother.
”No, stay please,” he whimpered.
“Hush, I’m not going anywhere,” Jarod mumbled soothingly and increased his grip on his brother once more. He stroked Jay’s back in soothing motions as well. “Hey, my boy,” Jarod whispered after some more time. “Let me get up for a second. I’ll get my sleeping bag over here. I will stay with you, ok?”
Jay nodded hesitantly against Jarod’s broad chest and he let go of his brother even more hesitatingly.
Jarod quickly strode over to his own bag and got all his things together. In a matter of seconds, he was back at Jay’s side. He slid into his own sleeping bag but then halted in his motions. “Jay, we can join the two sleeping bags if you want to,” Jarod half asked, half stated.
He knew from his own experience, from being a child and a grown adult, that physical contact could sometimes work wonders in pulling someone out of a nightmare and back into the reality. And Jarod saw just as well, that Jay was still deeply immersed in the effects of his nightmare. It still scared the hell out of him.
Jay nodded weakly.
When Jarod had zipped the bags together, he drew the boy into a tight embrace. Jay put his head on Jarod’s chest once more and he finally started to breathe easier.
“That’s it, Jay. You’ll be fine. I’m right here next to you,” Jarod soothed once more.
Jarod knew that he couldn’t shield the boy from the world or from these nightmares but he could at least protect him from being alone and having to cope with his nightmares alone.
And that was more than he’d once had.
It took Jay a long time to calm down completely and even longer to fall asleep again.
Jarod struggled to keep his eyes open, dozing off from time to time. Even though he succumbed to slumber every now and then, he kept a grasp on Jay. The boy had calmed down and he obviously didn’t need any more reassurance than Jarod’s presence besides him.
Finally they both dozed off to sleep for real.
To be continued…
~~~~~~~
Part 9
An extended stay
They had been sitting there on the ledge, side by side, for over an hour without anyone speaking and hardly moving when Jay finally looked up.
He was watching Jarod from the side. Jarod was aware of it but he chose to ignore it as long as Jay didn’t say anything.
The boy breathed deeply. “It’s really sad that we’ll have to go soon and that we can’t stay out here overnight,” he said regretfully.
Jarod looked at him. “We can, but I suggest we move up a bit further because there’s a small cave up there that provides more space,” he replied.
Jay looked at him in bewilderment. “It will get rather cold tonight.”
Jarod pattered the bag that was sitting besides him and grinned. “Also not a problem. I have two sleeping bags here.”
Jay just gaped at him. After a few moments he recovered. “You planned this rather thoughtfully, didn’t you?”
“Yes, as a matter of fact, I did,” Jarod grinned openly.
Jay nodded. “Wait, how do you know that there is a cave up there? You didn’t come here yesterday to check it out, did you?”
“No, I didn’t,” Jarod chuckled. “I have already been here before. About two and a half years ago I came here with a friend of mine and we went climbing. We didn’t need the cave back then but it stuck me as useful,” he paused. “It turns out that I was right with that.”
Jay grinned. “Yes, it looks like it. How far up is that?”
“About another ten or fifteen meters. I don’t really remember,” Jarod replied thoughtfully.
Jay nodded. “Ok.”
Jarod looked at his young companion and saw something in the boy’s eyes; a question was lingering at the edge of Jay’s mind. He didn’t press but waited for Jay to speak up.
“How about… I mean… maybe,” Jay stuttered.
“What?” Jarod asked, grinning.
“Could I try to lead?” Jay asked carefully.
Jarod quirked an eyebrow. “You think you could handle it? Do you feel safe enough to do it?”
Jay nodded slowly. “Do you think I will be able to do that?”
Jarod shrugged. “From what I saw earlier, you got a good grip in the wall. You made some real good moves even when you had gotten yourself into difficult positions. If you want to try,” he held up his hands, indicating that he wouldn’t hold Jay back.
Jay’s face lit up. “I would like to.”
“Ok. There’s not much that could happen if you stick to some basics. If you lose your footage and fall, your fall will - of course - be stopped by the rope but you might fall a short distance contrary to when you go second,” Jarod explained.
Jay nodded once more. “Ok.”
“You will have to pay attention to what you are doing more than before when you followed me but you will see that for yourself in the wall. It’s a different climb; you are more alert because the danger of falling is more immanent. At least that’s what I experienced,” Jarod told him.
Jay listened closely and waited for Jarod to go on.
“I will give you some more quickdraws. You will have to put them into the rings that are already fastened in the rock like you saw me doing it. You need to pay attention to how you put them into the wall,” Jarod said earnestly. He continued explaining some more basic rules to Jay so that the young man would be safe.
After a while, Jarod stopped and smiled at Jay. “Still interested in leading?”
“Yes,” Jay said, though slightly less enthusiastic than before.
Jarod smiled. “You’ll do just fine. Just pay attention to what you’re doing. Once you’re up onto the next ledge, secure yourself with another quickdraw in the bolt there and let me follow, ok?”
“Ok,” Jay nodded again and then looked up the wall that was going straight up from where they were.
“And keep remembering the way you put the rope into the quickdraws. Always coming from beyond you directly on the wall and then into the quickdraw and leading towards you.”
Jay looked over his shoulder at his older self… no brother, he corrected himself, and nodded again.
“Well then, up you go,” Jarod encouraged him, smiling.
It was indeed as Jarod had said, Jay decided while climbing. This was a lot more intense than following someone else up. When leading, you tried every stand and every crack more than once to make sure it was safe to put your hand or foot there. It was always a bit of a gamble to see if you were good enough to put your next move on that point and one felt the risk breathing down your neck more intensely once you were leading even though you were safely secured on the rope.
Once up on the ledge, he clipped himself into the metal ring that was bolted into the rock there and then he called down to Jarod. “Ok, I’m up. You can follow now.”
This time he watched Jarod climbing from above and once more he was fascinated by the man’s elegant and careful movements. His brother knew exactly where he could put his hand and what he would be able to manage. He radiated with a certainty and self-confidence and Jay found himself envying him.
He tried to shake that feeling but it stayed.
Jarod hoisted himself up on the ledge next to Jay and leaned back slightly to secure himself into the ring as well.
“Well done, Jay,” he nodded approvingly.
“Hmm,” Jay replied distractedly.
“What is it?” Jarod asked in a tone that showed that he didn’t want any excuses.
Jay huffed. “It’s just that I can’t help envying your movements.”
“You’re kidding, right?” Jarod asked incredulously.
Jay shook his head, his eyes cast downward. “No, it just looks so graceful when you’re climbing. It’s like you know exactly where to put your next move.”
“Oh, come on Jay. You can’t possibly be envious of me. I have a whole lot more experience than you. You’ve been climbing for the first time today so it’s normal that you’re still searching for the right balance from time to time. Don’t think I started the way I’m able to climb now. Believe me; I’ve had my share of misjudging and placing my trust into the wrong stones. And it’s not like I know where to put my hands before feeling the wall,” he looked at his young companion closely. “I also have to search for the right place to put my next move onto and I have to feel my way around. True, I might be faster than you at the moment but don’t think that it will stay that way. You have talent and if you start doing this more often, you will soon be just as fast as I am. You just mustn’t forget that this is the first time you went climbing. Got it?”
Jay smiled. “Yes, you’re right…,” he sighed. “It just looks so… easy.”
Jarod grinned and shook his head. “Wait until you’ve been climbing a bit more often and then you won’t complain. You’ll beat me in lengths there.”
“Would you… I mean,” he broke of and then started once more. “Would you mind if we went climbing every once in a while?”
Jarod chuckled. “Not at all!”
“That’s great,” Jay replied, a wide grin spreading on his face.
“Ok, how about we get the sleeping bags out and get ourselves stationed,” Jarod suggested.
Jay nodded but then he stopped in his tracks. “What about Marc and Carol? Won’t they be worried?”
“No, they won’t. They know that we might stay away over night,” Jarod informed his young brother.
“You really planned this,” Jay grumbled half-heartedly.
“Only prepared for every possibility,” Jarod countered. They both chuckled heartily and Jay found himself thoroughly enjoying this adventure with his older self… brother. He shook his head and rolled his eyes slightly.
“What?” Jarod grinned when he saw that movement.
“It’s just… I start trying to see you as my brother rather than my older self,” Jay admitted.
Jarod grinned. “Not that easy at first but you will get used to it.”
Jay looked at him closely. “It took you some time as well?”
“Certainly,” Jarod nodded vigorously. “And I didn’t even have you around at that time.”
Jay nodded slowly. “What do we do until it’s dark?”
Jarod pursed his lips. “How about we do a little more climbing? We can leave the things here. There is no way anyone will get up here without climbing and it’s already a bit too late to starting a climbing trip for the day,” they both got up from the floor. “Oh, and we should get ourselves some wood for a little fire, I don’t have that in the bag,” he grinned.
“You can’t conjure it up out of your bag?” Jay bantered back, grinning widely as well.
Jarod looked over to where his bag stood and pretended to think about it for a moment, then he turned back and started to say “yes” when he closed his mouth again. “No,” he huffed theatrically. “No, I don’t think I could.”
Jay laughed openly.
“You know, that’s better,” Jarod grinned and went on explaining what he meant when Jay tilted his head to the side in the same questioning gesture Jarod often did himself, “seeing you laugh and seeing you open up again.”
Jay paused shortly but then he nodded. “I’m glad that you didn’t give up on me. I don’t think that I would have gotten out of that one alone.”
“Maybe, maybe not, but that’s a what-if-case. You’re here now and we are having great fun,” Jarod replied and drew Jay over to him and into a hug. Jay relaxed into the welcoming arms of his big brother. He sighed deeply and leaned his head against Jarod’s shoulder. Jarod rocked them both lightly and put his chin on the boy’s head, finally allowing himself to relax further.
They both retreated reluctantly.
“How about we go climbing now?” Jarod suggested finally.
“Yeah,” Jay breathed deeply. “Thank you, Jarod,” he then added.
“You’re welcome,” Jarod said earnestly. “Come on now.”
~~~~~~~
They went climbing for another three hours in which they succeeded to triumph over some rather difficult routes. When they finally returned to their camp, they were tired both due to the physical - as well as the psychological - strain, so they decided to go to sleep rather early.
Jay was asleep in a matter of minutes, making Jarod smile when he looked over to his young companion.
Even though Jarod was tired, he couldn’t find sleep, so he just let his mind wander.
He silently sighed when he reviewed the events that had occurred that day, the problems they had come here with and the contempt and harmony they had found later.
He was glad that he had finally sought out a confrontation with his brother but even though it had taken him a long time to figure out what Jay’s problems had been, he didn’t want to miss one second he had spent with his younger brother.
Ok, Jay’s words had not always been easy to take, yet they had brought them to where they were now. He had come to see two different, nearly completely contrarian personas in the young man that was his brother; for once strong, independent and then the fragile and dependant character.
Jarod closed his eyes. The climbing tour had been great. Jay had changed during their adventure. What Jarod had seen when Jay had first been in the wall, the contentment in the young man’s eyes had multiplied after their argument. Jay didn’t have to hide his obvious liking in the sport any longer and he showed it openly to Jarod. He easily accepted tips where he could set his foot or hand from his brother and his eyes glowed with a sparkle that hadn’t been there before.
Jarod opened his eyes again when he heard soft sounds coming from where Jay was sleeping.
The boy was trashing around in his sleep, mumbling softly.
Jarod untangled himself from his sleeping bag and crawled over to where the boy was lying.
When Jarod approached him, he could hear the young man’s pleas. “No, please no. Stop. I don’t want that, please, no,” he moved his head from one side to the other in rapid speed and he tried to move his hands as well but in the confined space of the sleeping bag, he didn’t have room to move them. Even though Jarod tried not to, he could easily imagine it only raising the level of the young man’s fear and nightmare.
He quickly closed the remaining distance and then shook Jay’s shoulder rather harshly to get him out of his nightmare as soon as possible. “Jay,” he called out while shaking the young man’s shoulder.
Jay’s head jerked up and, still somewhere between sleep and consciousness, he tried to break free from his dream and tried to move his hands, only to find them restrained in the sleeping bag. He fought against the inhuman force that held him tied while Jarod tried to break through to him.
“Hey, Jay, it’s a nightmare. Come on out of it. You’re safe. I’ve got you,” Jarod tried to get his brother’s attention.
Jay’s eyes flew over to Jarod and after a heartbeat or two, realisation hit in. “Jarod?”
Jarod nodded and zipped the sleeping bag open to make it possible for Jay to move his hands freely. Jay was still shaken and had not completely withdrawn out of the nightmare. Once he felt the fresh air on his arms, he shivered. A sob escaped him and he threw himself at Jarod, who embraced his distraught brother firmly.
“It’s ok. I’ve got you now. You are safe. I’ve got you,” Jarod mumbled into the boy’s hair, drawing him close to his body.
Jay clung to his older brother, listening to the soothing words as well as to his brother’s heartbeat, letting himself be calmed down by both. Slowly getting his breathing back under control, Jay wondered how he had been able to get through his nightmares alone, or how he had been able to send anyone who tried to comfort him away. Marc and Carol had often rushed into his room in the middle of the night and at first he had gladly welcomed their presence but at the same time everything had changed, he had forced Carol and Marc away in the night.
Jarod kept on mumbling soothing words to Jay.
Jay let out a shuddering breath, glad that Jarod was here and that he didn’t have to go through this nightmare and its effects alone.
Jarod drew back a bit but Jay kept a firm grasp on his older brother.
”No, stay please,” he whimpered.
“Hush, I’m not going anywhere,” Jarod mumbled soothingly and increased his grip on his brother once more. He stroked Jay’s back in soothing motions as well. “Hey, my boy,” Jarod whispered after some more time. “Let me get up for a second. I’ll get my sleeping bag over here. I will stay with you, ok?”
Jay nodded hesitantly against Jarod’s broad chest and he let go of his brother even more hesitatingly.
Jarod quickly strode over to his own bag and got all his things together. In a matter of seconds, he was back at Jay’s side. He slid into his own sleeping bag but then halted in his motions. “Jay, we can join the two sleeping bags if you want to,” Jarod half asked, half stated.
He knew from his own experience, from being a child and a grown adult, that physical contact could sometimes work wonders in pulling someone out of a nightmare and back into the reality. And Jarod saw just as well, that Jay was still deeply immersed in the effects of his nightmare. It still scared the hell out of him.
Jay nodded weakly.
When Jarod had zipped the bags together, he drew the boy into a tight embrace. Jay put his head on Jarod’s chest once more and he finally started to breathe easier.
“That’s it, Jay. You’ll be fine. I’m right here next to you,” Jarod soothed once more.
Jarod knew that he couldn’t shield the boy from the world or from these nightmares but he could at least protect him from being alone and having to cope with his nightmares alone.
And that was more than he’d once had.
It took Jay a long time to calm down completely and even longer to fall asleep again.
Jarod struggled to keep his eyes open, dozing off from time to time. Even though he succumbed to slumber every now and then, he kept a grasp on Jay. The boy had calmed down and he obviously didn’t need any more reassurance than Jarod’s presence besides him.
Finally they both dozed off to sleep for real.
To be continued…
