Table of Contents [Report This]
by Brynna and Trixie
Disclaimer: The characters portrayed in this fan fiction belong to NBC and any other copyright holders. No infringement is intended.
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“You know Miss Parker, there’s no way you’re going to get me out of here in this weather,” Jarod says in a mocking voice from his position on the floor, hands hand cuffed behind his back.
Miss Parker glares in Jarod’s direction from where she’s sitting on top of his leather jacket on a bale of hay. “Shut the fuck up Jarod.”
Jarod raises a mocking eyebrow. “And where did you learn such language locked away in the Centre?” he asks in a feigned shocked voice.
One of Miss Parker’s eyebrows raises. “Well you obviously know the meaning of the word.”
Jarod’s face registers genuine surprise for a moment, before slipping back into his state of mocking amusement. “I detect a story behind that comment,” he murmurs, interested.
Miss Parker lets out a breath and rolls her eyes. “If there was one, you think I’d tell you? Just sit there and shut up. There’s enough noise with the thunder.”
“Not to mention the frightened horses,” Jarod murmurs. “However, I’m not sure what they’re more frightened of - the thunder, or your voice.”
Miss Parker glares at Jarod for a moment, and turns her head, looking out the small window by one of the stalls. “When the fuck is this rain going to stop?” she mutters under her breath.
“There’s that word again,” Jarod says in a sing-song voice. “Do I sense something Freudian?” he asks in a mock concerned voice.
Miss Parker stands up, grabbing his jacket from under her and throwing it at him. “SHUT UP!” she yells.
“Make me,” he challenges, tossing the jacket gently to the floor beside him.
Miss Parker reaches behind her and pulls her gun out of the waist of her skirt. She lazily levels it at Jarod’s head, looking in another direction.. “Shut the fuck up and don’t make me play with the gun.”
Jarod raises an eyebrow and quirks his lips at her. “The word *and* using what could arguably be called *the* phallic symbol - are you *sure* you don’t want to talk?”
Miss Parker continues staring in the opposite direction. She tilts the gun up about three inches and pulls the trigger, the bullet going through the wall of the barn an inch above Jarod’s head. “I said shut up. I don’t wanna hear your little wanna be psycho babble right now.”
Jarod sighs deeply. “You’ve just succeeded in frightening the horses again,” he says in a mournful tone. “But luckily, you’ve done nothing to dissuade me.” He smiles brightly. “So. . . . anything new?” he asks brightly.
Miss Parker sighs deeply and looks around the barn for a moment. She sighs again and kicks off one of her shoes, pulling the thigh high nylon off her leg. She puts her shoe back on and walks over to Jarod. “See, and I was trying to avoid this. Out of the goodness of my heart,” she says in a sarcastic, acid laced tone. “Too bad.” She leans over and quickly gags him with
the nylon, tying it around his head.
Quickly, before she knows what hit her, Jarod snaps his wrist around, having already picked the hand cuffs with a straight piece of straw. He snaps one of the cuffs around her wrist, then grabbing the other, snaps it as well and flips her onto her back, cuffed to the support beam in the center of the barn. He reaches his hands up and unties the nylon, spitting it out of his mouth. He sits a good distance away from her, out of kicking range and smiles. “Feel more like talking now?” he asks in a persuading voice.
Miss Parker narrows her eyes dangerously at him. “Uncuff me you God damn fucking bastard.”
Jarod leans back and sighs. “That word again,” he comments, amusement coloring his voice. “And I don’t think so. Not that I don’t trust you,” he says in a placating voice, “it’s just that I’d prefer *not* to go back to the Centre.”
Miss Parker twists her wrists against the handcuffs and sighs deeply. “You are such an ass hole.”
“I am what my captors made me,” he murmurs in a non-committal voice, walking around to her back and kneeling down behind the support beam. “But then, you would know all about being a product of one’s environment, wouldn’t you Miss Parker?” he asks in a gently mocking voice.
Miss Parker twists her head around the beam, trying to look at Jarod. “What the hell are you doing?” she asks in an exasperated tone.
“Just trying to make sure you don’t hurt yourself,” he murmurs, taking out a few pieces of gauze from his last Pretend and lining the inside of the cuffs with them. “You seem to be twisting your wrists awfully hard.”
Miss Parker lifts her head and leans it back against the support beam, staring off in the other direction. “Oh. You’re a considerate ass hole. How lovely.”
“You know,” he says in an annoyed tone, leaning his head around over her shoulder, “I wouldn’t be calling other people ass hole if I was such a first class bitch,” he says in an acidic tone.
Miss Parker turns her head and glares at him. “I never said I wasn’t Jarod. At least I acknowledge it.”
Jarod shakes his head softly. “What exactly is it about me that leads to your assumption that I’m an ass hole?” he asks in a curious voice.
Miss Parker glares at him for a moment then turns her head away, leaning it back and staring at the ceiling. “I will not get into this conversation.”
“Oh, why not Miss Parker?” he asks in a persuading ‘aw shucks’ voice. “We’ve got nothing better to do.”
Miss Parker keeps her eyes focused on the ceiling, ignoring him.
Sighing, Jarod stands and walks to the other side of the barn, opening a cupboard and pulling out some bottled water and a package of animal crackers. He walks back over to about five feet in front of her, sitting down and beginning to eat quietly. Miss Parker lowers her eyes for a moment, looking over at him. She sighs and looks back up at the ceiling. Jarod munches on
a few animal crackers, then pauses, looking down at one in his hand. He looks back up at her, his eyes holding a gentle amusement and fondness. “Would you like the rabbit?” he asks softly.
Miss Parker lifts her head, looking at him. “Are you attempting a civil conversation?”
Jarod sighs. “Apparently not,” he mutters under his breath. “Forgive my interruption of your contemplation of the fascinating rafters.”
Miss Parker shuts her eyes for a moment. She shakes her head, pushing back unwelcome memories. “Sorry,” she mutters.
Jarod’s eyes widen and he looks at her mutely for a moment, too stunned to speak. He swallows. “Did an apology just leave your lips?” he asks ina genuinely shocked tone.
Miss Parker’s eyes open slowly. “Don’t expect another one.”
“Oh, parish the thought,” Jarod says in an aggrieved tone. “I didn’t think for a second you’d repent your entire personality.”
Miss Parker sighs and tries to calm her voice. “There is absolutely no point in the two of us speaking to each other.”
Jarod is silent for a full minute. “You didn’t use to think so,” he says in a soft, far away voice.
“It didn’t use to be this impossible,” she replies in a neutral but quiet voice.
“What exactly has made it impossible?” he asks, confused.
Miss Parker shakes her head a little and turns her gaze to the ceiling, staying silent.
“Ahh, yet another unspeakable topic,” he mutters in annoyance and exasperation.
Miss Parker sighs in exasperation. “Will you just shut up for like, five minutes?”
Jarod quirks his lips and says nothing else. “Thank you,” she mutters, still staring up at the roof of the barn.
Jarod stands up and walks over to the stalls, taking a brush and entering one, brushing one of the horses down, murmuring softly to it. He goes stall by stall, brushing down each horse until he’s been through all eight. He tosses the brush to the ground and walks back over to his original position, sitting down, silent again.
Miss Parker lifts her head to stare out the window and groans. She moves the stiff muscles. “Shit,” she murmurs under her breath, turning her neck from side to side, trying to work some of the kinks out.
Jarod looks up at her, concerned. “Are you okay?” he asks softly.
“I’m fine,” she murmurs, still moving her head from side to side slowly,
shrugging her shoulders a little.
“Why do I not believe you?” he mutters, standing and walking behind her, kneeling again. “What did you do?”
Miss Parker shakes her head a little, and visibly winces when she strains a muscle in her neck again. “Too much avoiding looking at you.”
Jarod sighs. “Wonderful - another ailment that’s *my* fault,” he says in a sarcastic tone. He moves his hands to either side of her neck, moving his thumbs along her clavicle, his fingers rubbing the back of her neck softly.
Miss Parker lets out a soft moan and bites her lower lip. “I didn’t say it was your fault Jarod,” she says softly.
“Yea, but eventually everything that goes wrong in your life is,” he murmurs, equally soft, still rubbing the sides of her neck, then the back softly.
Miss Parker shuts her eyes and licks her lips. “I never said that either.”
“Sure you did,” he says softly. “One night when I called you. You said exactly that. Apparently you’d just found out about the ulcer,” he says in a remindfull tone.
Miss Parker jerks her neck away from Jarod’s hands. “And at the time I’m sure I meant it. I just don’t remember it.”
“Are you saying you don’t mean it anymore?” he asks in a soft tone, moving his hands back to her neck and rubbing again, his thumbs moving up and down the sides of her neck while his fingers kneed at the base of her neck and skull.
Miss Parker jerks her head away again. “Stop Jarod. Just go. . . . play with the horses or sit and stare at me, or whatever the hell it is you wanna do. Just leave me alone.”
Sighing, Jarod shakes his head softly in frustration and sits back, leaning to his side to watch her profile. “How bad does your neck hurt?” he asks softly. “I’ll leave you alone after I’m sure it isn’t serious.”
She turns her head and looks at him for a moment. “Fine. Just a little stiff neck from staring at the ceiling in a rather awkward position for too long.”
Nodding slowly, Jarod moves in front of her about four feet and lays down on the small covering of hay, bunching his leather jacket under his head and closing his eyes. Miss Parker leans her head back against the post. She sighs and shuts her eyes, then opens them again when images she doesn’t want to acknowledge assault her. She turns her head to the side and stares out the window, jumping a little at a flash of lightning.
“You okay?” Jarod asks in a whisper soft voice he knows she could ignore if she wants to, not opening his eyes.
Miss Parker squeezes her eyes shut for a moment, then opens them again, focusing on the stack of hay bales against the wall. “What do you think?”
“I’m willing to field a guess that you’re not,” he says in that same voice.
“Brilliant observation Genius,” she says quietly, but slightly menacingly.
“Those are my specialty,” he murmurs in a self mocking tone.
Miss Parker continues staring at the hay bales. “Is this going somewhere?”
“Doubtful,” Jarod murmurs, still not opening his eyes. “After all - you don’t wanna talk about it.”
Miss Parker exhales a ragged breath. “No, I don’t,” she says softly.
Jarod slowly opens his eyes, looking at her carefully. “Then I don’t see where we could really go,” he tells her softly.
Miss Parker leans her head to the side a little warily. “That’s what I’ve been saying. There is nowhere to go.”
Jarod quirks his lips a little. “There’s always someplace to go,” he murmurs. “It’s just that a lot of the time, it’s a place we’d rather not visit.”
“Are you trying to prove a point Jarod?” she asks in a tired voice.
“No,” he murmurs in an equally tired voice. “I guess I’m just trying to find a truth.”
“Good luck in finding it Jarod.”
Jarod shakes his head sadly. “That’s the problem,” he whispers. “I can’t find it without you.”
Miss Parker turns her head, looking at him. “So you want my help?” she asks softly, her tone equally confused and pissed off. “All the shit you put me through constantly, and you want my help?”
Jarod sits up sharply and glares at her angrily. “All the shit *I* put *you* through?” he asks in an incredulous tone. “You’re the one that hunts me down like an animal on a daily basis.”
Miss Parker off handedly shrugs a shoulder. “So we put each other through a lot of shit. I’m not asking for your help. With anything.”
He shakes his head. “You are unbelievable,” he mutters. “And I wasn’t asking for you help. I just said I couldn’t find something I was looking for without you. You’ve confused honesty with my actually asking you a question. I can understand how that might happen though, considering the world you exist in daily.”
Miss Parker keeps her gaze steady on his face. “You really think you have a clue, don’t you?”
Jarod shakes his head, furrowing his eyebrows. “What?” he asks sharply.
An ironic smile crosses her face momentarily. “You honestly think you understand me. And that amuses me.”
Jarod shakes his head. “I would never presume to understand you,” he says softly. “I did once. Once upon a time,” he says in a bitter voice. “But I don’t. Not anymore. I haven’t in years.” He shrugs his shoulders a little. “I *could* get inside your head. I could figure you out so that I understood what you were thinking better then you did. But I won’t.” He shakes his
head. “I have no desire to.”
Miss Parker raises an eyebrow. “Aw, isn’t that sweet?” she says in a sarcastic tone. “You’re willing to not get inside my head for my sake. Whatever.”
Jarod shakes his head, a humorless smile creasing his face. “Not for your sake,” he murmurs. “For mine.”
Miss Parker nods, a smile crossing her face for a moment. “Duh.”
Jarod shakes his head again. “And that would be why,” he mutters.
Miss Parker chuckles a little bitterly. “Oh how cute - The genius is willing to sacrifice a learning experience to avoid my insanity. I’m honored.”
Jarod narrows his eyes at her, resting his arms on his knees, his head on his folded hands. “Actually, I’d just rather not see some of the things I know haunt your dreams, not to mentionyour waking moments.” He shrugs a little. “I have enough of my own.”
Miss Parker sighs, turning her face away from his. “Don’t play shrink Jarod. Leave it to Sydney.”
Jarod shrugs off handedly. “Whatever,” he murmurs. “I’m not particularly interested in playing shrink anyway. It never held much appeal.” He miles humorlessly. “Too many of them around me at a young age.”
Miss Parker shrugs a little. “You know, it’s been said that if you fight oo hard, you tend to become what you’re fighting against.”
Jarod raises an eyebrow out her, rankling a little, but refusing to let it show too much. “Turning philosophic on me?” he asks in a soft tone with a minimal edge.
Miss Parker shakes her head and looks at him. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to say that out loud.”
“You’re apologizing again,” he says in a neutral voice.
Miss Parker sighs. “I just said something that I shouldn’t have.”
“Don’t apologize,” he says slowly. “It doesn’t suit you.”
Miss Parker sighs deeply. “And what does?”
“That,” he murmurs. “That edge. That unrepentant, uncaring, no hold bars take no prisoners no tolerance for bullshit attitude.” He shakes his head a little. “You’ve had it since you were a child. The only problem I see is that you’ve let it completely dominate your personality.”
Miss Parker leans her head to the side. “And here I always thought that you didn’t think the cold heartless bitch routine suited me. It’s nice to know I was wrong.”
Jarod rises up on his knees and crawls a little closer to her, sitting down so his knees touch her feet. “The cold heartless bitch, doesn’t,” he murmurs softly. “The above listed qualities do. There is a difference.”
Miss Parker sighs again. “Funny. I always thought that all of the above came in a little package.”
Jarod shakes his head. “I’m so sick of this,” he murmurs in a tired voice.
One of Miss Parker’s eyebrows arches in question. “Sick of what?” she asks in an overly sweet, bright tone.
Jarod laughs a little. “That,” he says simply. “I’m sick of not being able to get through to you. Of your refusal to see what the Centre is, and does. What your father is, and does,” he says in a low, frustrated tone.
Miss Parker lets out a small, annoyed breath. “You currently have my undivided attention. Do whatever the hell you want.”
Jarod shakes his head softly. “Don’t say things you don’t mean,” he says in a low, dangerous voice.
“Jarod, you have me handcuffed to a fucking beam in the middle of a barn in the middle of nowhere Kentucky, in a rainstorm. You’re not going anywhere, I’m not going anywhere. I don’t see how you have anything less than my undivided attention for the
moment, seeing as you won’t shut up.” She sighs deeply. “Get it?”
Jarod takes a breath and looks at her carefully. “So are you saying you’re willing to talk now, or are you going to decide when things get too personal, or too intense that ‘you don’t wanna do this now’?” he asks in an even, measured tone.
Miss Parker sighs. “I said you had my undivided attention Jarod. Meaning, if you wanna speak, I will listen. As to whether or not I’m speaking back. . .” she smiles. “That all depends on what you have to say.”
Jarod looks at her for a moment. “Fair enough,” he murmurs finally. “When did you stop thinking me of a friend, and start thinking of me as a freak?” he asks in a small, soft voice.
Miss Parker tilts her head to the side, staring off in the corner of the room. “Did I?” she asks in a distracted voice.
Jarod leans a little closer to her. “I thought so,” he murmurs softly. “You’ve said as much. Done as much.”
Miss Parker shrugs a shoulder, her eyes still staring off into space. “Yea, I guess I have.”
Jarod looks at her oddly. “Is something wrong?” he asks softly. He rolls his eyes. “Other then the obvious,” he clarifies.
Miss Parker quirks her lips a little. “Oh probably.”
Jarod sighs. “Anything I can help you with?”
Miss Parker shakes her head. “Probably not.”
Jarod swallows. “If I were to tell you something, would you at least try to consider it as being true?” he asks in a soft, earnest voice.
Miss Parker turns her head, looks at him. “I can’t make you any promises. But I’ll try.”
Jarod smiles a little. “I suppose that’s the best I’m going to get,” he murmurs. “Would you like me to ease into this, or would you prefer to be blind sided with it?” he asks in a conversational tone.
Miss Parker raises her eyebrows. “Blunt and to the point usually works best for me.”
Jarod nods slowly. “All right. Mr. Parker is not your father - that you knew. Or at least suspected. Mr. Raines, is,” he adds softly.
Miss Parker lets out a sharp breath. “Excuse me?” she says in an incredulous tone.
Jarod inclines his head once. “Better then I’d dreaded,” he murmurs softly, under his breath. “I pieced it together last night. I had planned on calling you tonight, but. . .” he trails off, looking around the barn.
Miss Parker exhales raggedly and takes a few moments before inhaling again. She stares at Jarod for a moment and turns her head, staring up at the ceiling. She shuts her eyes and lets out a blood curdling scream.
Jarod frowns sympathetically and inches a little closer to her, laying a hand on her knee. “Would you like to know how I found out, or would you prefer to pretend I didn’t say anything?”
Miss Parker sucks in a few deep breaths. “How did you find out?” she asks in a barely audible whisper.
“Your mother’s diary,” he says softly. “She never actually came out and said it, but. . . I read certain passages a few times and something was nagging at me. One night, I sat bolt upright in bed and started reading one paragraph, then one line, over, and over, and over again.” He sighs and shakes his head, a small, sad smile tinged with irony crossing his face. “She wrote
‘my baby girl, I hope you never start smoking.’” Jarod takes a deep breath. “I accessed Centre files and finally managed to hack my way into Raines’ last physical. I got his blood work, compared it with yours. …there isn’t a doubt,” he finishes softly.
Miss Parker shuts her eyes tightly. She takes a deep breath and holds it for close to a minute before exhaling slowly. “I’m assuming that you have whatever you found somewhere around? You don’t expect me to accept that on your word, do you?”
Jarod shakes his head softly. “I don’t expect it, no,” he says softly. “And in answer, no, I don’t have it on me, or here in the barn. But I do have your mother’s diary in a safe deposit box somewhere, and I have the DNA results on my laptop.” He looks at her carefully. “I’ll send you both after I get out of here.”
Miss Parker nods her head slowly, her eyes still squeezed shut. “Good.”
“Are you all right?” he asks in a concerned voice.
She blinks her eyes open and stares at him. “Oh yea, I’m wonderful,” she says sarcastically. “This has been the best day I’ve had in a long time.”
Jarod quirks his eyebrows. “Glad I could be here,” he murmurs, equally sarcastic.
Miss Parker lets out a ragged sigh. “No Jarod, I’m not okay. My entire world is going to hell. It’s fun. I’m sure you’re familiar with it.”
Jarod nods slowly. “Yes, I am,” he says softly. “And you should be too. It’s been going to hell for years. The sensation isn’t pleasant, and it hurts like hell. But when you think about it. . . it really wasn’t much of a world to begin with. I know mine wasn’t.”
Miss Parker shuts her eyes again for a moment. “So what would you recommend when the slow progression into hell is suddenly sped up by a good hundred and fifty percent? Any words of advice on how to deal with things?”
Jarod nods. “Yes. But you won’t accept them.”
Miss Parker rolls her eyes and lets out a bitter chuckle. “Oh try me Jarod.”
“Leave,” he says softly. “Get away from Raines, and Parker and everything. You don’t go to hell when you get the hell out of the gates,” he says in a ragged voice. “That’s what I did. And while it isn’t all a bed of roses, it’s a hell of a lot better.”
Miss Parker nods her head a little, her eyes shutting again. “I really didn’t even have to ask. I knew that was your answer.”
“It’s not like I’ve never suggested it before,” he murmurs softly. “You do realize I’ll help you hide from them if you leave, right?”
Miss Parker sighs dramatically. “Oh, that would be. . . interesting. The two of us, traipsing around the country, you doing whatever the hell it is you do for everyone else, and me sitting around. . . what? Smoking and being bored and bitching at you? Sounds like *fun*.”
“I didn’t say you’d be *with* me,” Jarod says in an amused tone. “I said I’d help you hide from them. As in set you up somewhere far, far away, new name, new identity. Then you’d be on your own,” he says slowly.
Miss Parker rolls her eyes. “Much better.”
Jarod shakes his head and sighs. “Anti-social much?” he asks in a sardonic tone.
“Only when trapped in a storm in the middle of nowhere handcuffed to a beam. It tends to make me not wanna deal with reality. Especially not when you’re involved.”
Jarod makes a tsking sound. “And when our roles were reversed, you were what. .. .content?” he asks, raising an eyebrow.
“Incredibly fed up and thoroughly exhausted,” she mutters.
Jarod sighs deeply. “If I were to uncuff you, would you promise not to try and kill me?” he asks slowly.
Miss Parker raises an eyebrow. “I have no desire to kill you. Well, not any that I’d act on anyway. And you’d trust me even if I said I wouldn’t?”
Jarod looks at her carefully. “That would depend on how you said it,” he says softly.
Miss Parker lets out a deep, annoyed sigh. “I won’t kill you Jarod,” she says in the most sincere tone she can muster.
Jarod quirks his lips, raising an eyebrow. “Eh, wrong answer,” he murmurs. “I wouldn’t trust that tone. .” he shakes his head. “There is no suitable analogy for how little I trust that tone,” he says in a long, drawn out breath.
Miss Parker groans a little and leans back against the beam. “I doubt there’s any tone that you would trust Jarod, and I’m not even going to bother trying.”
Jarod shrugs. “You’re wrong. You do have a tone that I trust. But you can’t duplicate it unless you mean it.” He smiles. “It’s impossible.”
Miss Parker sighs and shuts her eyes for a moment. “I am too tired and too stressed and in quite frankly too much pain to play games right now. So uncuff me, don’t, I don’t care just leave me alone.”
Jarod moves a little closer to her and lays a hand on her shoulder. “Are you in physical pain?” he asks softly, knowing full well she’s in emotional pain.
Miss Parker stares down at the ground. “My back is killing me from sitting in this position. My shoulders hurt, my wrists hurt, my neck still hurts.” She shakes her head. “But that’s not what I was referring to and you know it.”
Jarod sighs and leans around the side, picking one of the handcuffs quickly, and bringing her arms around. He quickly snaps them again in front of her. “I don’t trust you that much,” he murmurs. He moves an arm behind her back, shoving slightly and laying her down. He grabs his leather jacket and lays it under her head. “I really don’t know what to do about the rest,”
he says softly.
She shakes her head a little and curls herself into a ball. “There’s nothing you can do,” she murmurs.
Jarod takes a deep, ragged breath. He lays his hand against her back lightly. “Can I rub your back?” he asks in a whisper.
Miss Parker shuts her eyes tightly and after a few moments nods once, slowly, not saying anything. Jarod moves a little closer to her and brings his other hand up, slowly running soft, soothing circles along the middle of her back. He runs the back of his knuckles down her lower back, then up her spine to the base of her neck, then back down again. He rubs her shoulders gently, his thumbs brushing back and forth over her clavicles. Miss Parker keeps her body curled up and her eyes squeezed shut. She rather unsuccessfully attempts to relax. Jarod moves one of his hands to her shoulder, running it down her arm, then back up. “Breathe,” he whispers softly. “You’re not right now.”
She slowly exhales the breath she was holding. It takes her a few moments to inhale another one. Jarod shuts his eyes for a moment, feeling how uneven her breathing was. He moves his hands again, running them over her back, then around to her ribs, then back to her shoulders. “Breathe with me,” he says softly. “In, one two three four five, out one two three four five.”
Miss Parker attempts to breathe along with his voice. She finds herself instead holding her breath. “Damnit,” he mutters softly, running his hand up and down her arm again. “Breathe,” he almost pleads.
Miss Parker turns her head a little and looks up at him. “Wouldn’t it just be easier on you if I just passed out for awhile and you wouldn’t have me to deal with? It would be easier on me.”
Jarod shakes his head slowly. “No, it wouldn’t be easier on me,” he murmurs softly. “But if it would be easier on you, I could go get one of the horse tranquilizers and knock you out,” he whispers with a perfectly straight face.
Miss Parker slowly and deliberately inhales and exhales a couple of times. “That’s okay. I’ll just. . . try and remember to do this
correctly.”
Jarod smiles softly. “Very good,” he murmurs. He runs his hand up and down her back again, rubbing his knuckles against her, pushing with gentle pressure.
Miss Parker turns her head back, staring at the wall. She lets out a sharp breath as Jarod’s hand runs over her extremely sore muscles. “I’m sorry,” he murmurs. “Did I hurt you?”
Miss Parker shakes her head a little. “No. I wasn’t in pain. It just feels really good,” she murmurs softly.
Nodding, Jarod continues to rub her back with precise, gentle pressure, running his fingertips and the pads of his thumbs over her pressure points, along her spine which he knew had been pressed against the damn beam for way too long. He felt a twinge of guilt, his hand hovering over her spine for a moment, before moving again. Miss Parker sighs a little and turns
her head again, looking up at him. “Don’t feel bad Jarod. I would’ve left you there all night.”
Jarod chuckles a little, moving his hands up and down her back, flattening the palms. “That’s a little spooky,” he murmurs softly. “And I guess I just don’t have the heart to be a hostage taker.”
Miss Parker smiles a little sadly. “It’s probably a good thing that you don’t.”
“Why?” he asks. “I’m attempting to endeavor to be a little bit more ruthless.”
Miss Parker shakes her head. “Don’t. You don’t need to be. You don’t want to be. Trust me.”
Jarod nods slowly, running his hand over her shoulder, grazing the backs of his knuckles over her cheek, then back to her shoulder again. “And what do you want, my dear Miss Parker?” he murmurs softly.
Miss Parker shrugs a shoulder. “I’ve stopped wanting things because I can’t have them, and it’s easier.”
Jarod shakes his head. “You can have things you want,” he murmurs softly. “You just have to want different things sometimes.”
“That’s never been my experience,” she says softly. “So I basically just gave up.”
“It wasn’t my experience either,” he murmurs softly. “And I had given up wanting things for a very long time. And then one day,” he whispers, “I decided I wanted my freedom.” He runs his hands up and down her back, pushing outward from her spine. “I got that. And I wanted it more then I have ever wanted. . . .” he trails off. “Well.. . almost.”
Miss Parker raises a questioning eyebrow. “What did you want more?” she asks quietly.
Jarod shakes his head a little. “It’s not important anymore,” he says softly. “It’s one of those things *I* learned not to want.”
Miss Parker quirks her lips a little. “So you’re saying that the things that I want should be important, and that I can actually have them, but the one thing that you want, or wanted more then your freedom isn’t, and you can’t? You realize that doesn’t make
sense, right?”
Jarod shuts his eyes. “It doesn’t make sense because you don’t know what it is that I want,” he says softly, running the backs of his knuckles up and down her back again, curving his hands over her shoulders, rubbing softly with his thumbs, then moving
back down her back again.
Miss Parker struggles a little to sit up. She turns and looks at him carefully. “No, I don’t. Would you care to enlighten me?”
Jarod runs the tips of his fingers down her cheek softly, feathering them over her jaw. He shakes his head, a kind of embarrassed, wary amusement in his eyes. “I really wouldn’t,” he says softly.
Miss Parker scrunches up her face in recognition. “You sure you don’t wanna tell me?” she asks softly, moving her hands out of her lap to rest lightly on his leg.
Jarod shuts his eyes and swallows. “I was until you touched me,” he says in a tight voice.
Miss Parker raises an eyebrow. “Change your mind?” she asks in a completely innocent tone.
Jarod shuts his eyes tighter and takes a deep breath. “You,” he whispers.
A small smile crosses her face for a moment. “Look at me Jarod,” she murmurs softly.
Jarod takes a few deep breaths, then slowly, opens his eyes, looking at her. His face is unsure and scared, and he remains silent.
Miss Parker runs one of her hands up to his cheek, the other holding onto her own wrist. Jarod grimaces. “What the hell,” he mutters. He reaches behind him and grabs a straight piece of straw, quickly undoing the handcuffs and tossing them to the side. He takes one of her wrists and rubs it softly with his thumb. “Promise me you’ll knock me out quick and painless,” he
mutters.
Miss Parker returns her hand to his cheek. “Who said I was gonna knock you out?” she murmurs. “And you know, the key was in my pocket.”
“You mean the one I lifted and threw away?” he asks, eyebrow raised.
Miss Parker shakes her head and reaches her hand into her other pocket. “This one.”
Jarod narrows his eyes. “Then why the hell did you stay handcuffed?” he asks in a baffled tone.
“Because I was just too tired and too hurt and not thinking clearly.” She smiles a little ironically. “Because I’m being a complete idiot tonight. On many different counts.”
Jarod shuts his eyes. “I’m sorry,” he murmurs. He takes the hand not on his cheek and brings it to his mouth, kissing her wrist softly. “I’m very sorry.”
Miss Parker shakes her head. “Don’t apologize. It doesn’t suit either one of us.”
Jarod laughs a little. “It really doesn’t,” he murmurs almost inaudibly. He licks his lips. “I told you what I wanted. Tell me something you wanted.”
Sighing deeply, raggedly, Miss Parker glances down, then up at his face. “You,” she murmurs. “And I don’t mean you back at the Centre, I mean . . . just you. Like this. Okay, not like *this*, but . . . ” She sighs again. “Do you understand what I’m saying?” she asks in a slightly lost tone.
Jarod leans forward and kisses her lips, unimaginably softly. “I understand,” he whispers against her mouth.
Miss Parker kisses him back softly. She leans her head back a little and looks him in the eye. “So now what?”
Jarod shrugs a little helplessly. “I just got something I’d always wanted,” he murmurs. “A big part of me doesn’t wanna jinx it by wanting. . . or hoping for more, but. . . the rest of me. . . wants. . . everything,” he says softly.
Miss Parker takes a deep, shuddering breath. “Nobody knows I’m here,” she says softly.
Jarod raises an eyebrow. “You didn’t find me through Centre channels?” he asks softly.
She shakes her head. “No.” She smiles a little. “I just kind of got inside your head for once.”
Jarod smiles widely. “That’s good,” he murmurs. “I’ve wanted you inside my head for years.”
Miss Parker chuckles softly and leans her head up, kissing his forehead. “Well, it did facilitate a couple of good things I guess. It wasn’t easy though.”
“My thought process never is,” he murmurs.
Miss Parker nods. “So I noticed. Anyway, no one has a clue where I am. I told them I was going to Idaho.”
Jarod nods slowly. “Are you saying what I hope you’re saying?” he asks in a shaky voice.
Miss Parker smiles gently and shuts her eyes for a minute, nodding her head. “I think so.”
Jarod leans down and kisses her, hard and fast. He smiles brightly. “Where do you wanna go?”
Miss Parker shrugs. “Right now, I just wanna be in your arms.”
Jarod shakes his head, as though clearing. “You mean you’re not?” he murmurs, moving his arms and wrapping them around her back, holding her tightly. “I must be an idiot.”
Miss Parker wraps her arms around his shoulders and shakes her head a little. “No Jarod. That’s my designation.”
“Hey,” he admonishes gently, “don’t talk about the woman I love like that.”
Miss Parker lets out a shaky breath, her arms tightening around his neck. “I’ll remember that,” she says in a shaky voice.
“I’ll never let you forget it again,” he whispers. He kisses the tip of her nose.
Miss Parker lays her head down on his shoulder. “So where do you wanna go?”
Jarod quirks his lips and shrugs a little. “Everywhere,” he whispers. “I wanna go everywhere I’ve never been and see it all for the first time with you. Then I wanna go everywhere I’ve been before, and see it again, through different eyes, because you’ll be
with me.”
Miss Parker blinks hard a couple of times, a tear running down her cheek. “Everywhere,” she murmurs softly. “I hear it’s lovely there this time of year.”
Jarod smiles gently, kissing the top of her head. “I understand the sun never stops shining and it’s so restful people actually sleep.”
“Sleep?” she asks in a slightly amazed tone. “What’s that?”
“Peaceful relaxation,” Jarod murmurs. “At least that’s what people tell me.”
Miss Parker tightens her arms around his neck. “I don’t know, this is pretty peaceful.”
“I agree,” Jarod murmurs, running his fingertips over her lower back gently. “This is as peaceful as I’ve ever been in my life.”
Miss Parker lifts her head and kisses his mouth gently. “I think sleep may be overrated.”
“You just may be right,” he whispers, kissing her back.
“So . . .” she takes a deep breath. “Now what?” she asks in a soft murmur.
“Now,” Jarod says in a whisper soft voice, “we live our lives.” He smiles gently. “Together.” He raises an eyebrow. “Unless you weren’t looking for an answer quite so. . . . broad?”
Miss Parker smiles. “Well, I like that answer . . . but I was asking about in the next little while, like . . . until the storm lets up.”
Jarod runs his hands up and down her back slowly. “That all depends,” he murmurs. “How are you feeling?” he asks, equal parts seductive and concerned.
A gentle smile crosses Miss Parker’s face. “I’m still a little sore, and . . . god, we won’t talk about my mental state, but I’m okay.”
Jarod leans forward and kisses her cheek gently, moving his lips to her ear. “I don’t want to hurt you worse,” he whispers. “So just let me know if you want to stop.”
Miss Parker runs one of her hands up to his hair. “I won’t want to stop,” she murmurs. She turns her head and kisses his lips gently, then a little harder.
Jarod kisses her back, running his hands over her lower back, fluttering his fingers over her ribs. He licks her lips with his tongue, nipping lightly with his teeth. Miss Parker lazily runs her tongue into his mouth, running it over his. Her hands run down his back to the hem of his shirt and slides her fingers under it, over his back. Jarod moves his hands down her hip to her thigh, lifting her leg until he can get to her foot. He pulls her remaining shoe off, then runs his hand slowly up her leg, reaching the top of her nylon, and easing it off her leg. Jarod runs his hand up and down her leg, from just above her knee to her hip, and back again.
Miss Parker moves her lips down his neck, kissing the skin to the pulse, sucking lightly. Her hands run up further on his back, pulling the material up with her wrists. She moves her head back for a moment, pulling his shirt over his head. She moves her head back to his neck, placing open-mouthed kisses over his skin. Jarod runs the backs of his knuckles down the front of her jacket, unbuttoning it, then slowly pushing it off her shoulders. He moves his hands back, unbuttoning the first six buttons on her blouse, reaching a hand inside to cup her breast gently through her bra, rolling her nipple against his palm. Miss Parker moans softly against his neck and runs her hands down his shoulders to his waist, running her fingers around the belt on his jeans.
Jarod runs his mouth down her throat, licking her skin softly. He keeps one hand on her breast, the other running down her ribs to her leg, moving her skirt up and running his hand up and down her leg. Miss Parker moves her legs around his waist and runs her hands down the front of his jeans, undoing the belt buckle. She kisses her way down his neck to his chest, raining soft kisses over his shoulders and down to one of his nipples, running her tongue over it. Jarod gasps a little and moves his hands inside her blouse, under her back, unclasping her bra and pulling it down her shoulders, running his hand inside the sleeve of her blouse, pulling the strap out, then repeating the motion with her other strap, tossing the bra to the side without having taken her blouse off. He leans his head down and kisses the tops of her breasts, his tongue darting out to lick her nipple.
Miss Parker leans her head back and lets out a soft moan. She unbuckles his belt completely and unbuttons his jeans. She runs one of her hands up to his hair, the other sliding inside of his jeans and cupping him through his boxers. Jarod groans against her breast, enclosing her nipple in his mouth and sucking, hard. He runs a hand down her ribs to her hip, inching her skirt up to her waist, running his hands underneath her panties, cupping her ass. Miss Parker moves her hands to his hips and pushes his jeans down as far as she can. She moves her hand back to his erection, wrapping her hand around it, stroking it softly. Jarod groans, low and deep in his throat. He slides one of his hands around her hip, sliding it underneath the waist band of her panties, his fingertips brushing over her clit lightly. He releases her breast, then kisses his way over to the other, wrapping his lips around her other nipple and sucking, harder, releasing, licking a full circle with his tongue, and sucking again.
Miss Parker arches her back a little against his mouth. She leans her head back and takes a couple of shallow breaths. She squeezes his erection gently and murmurs his name under herbreath a couple of times. Jarod runs his fingers along her clit, then moves them down further, slipping one inside her, moving it out, then slipping two inside her. His thumb rubs over her clit softly, his fingers stroking in and out of her while his mouth continues to suck hard on her nipple. Miss Parker tangles her fingers of her free hand into his hair. She rolls back onto her back and pulls him down with her.
Jarod moves with her, his mouth never leaving her breast, his fingers still working in and out of her. He moves his thumb against her clit faster, harder, rubbing small circles. Miss Parker arches her hips against his hand and moans. She moves her hand from his erection to on top of his, stilling his movement. “Jarod,” she whispers. “I don’t wanna come yet.”
Jarod lets go of her breast and moves his head up to hers, kissing her softly. “Why not?” he murmurs, his finger still moving softly over her clit below her hand.
Miss Parker shuts her eyes for a moment and lets out another moan. She opens her eyes and looks at him. “Because I want you inside me when I do.”
Jarod shuts his eyes for a moment and kisses her softly, slowly withdrawing his hand from her body. He runs it up her rib cage, cupping her breasts softly, then tangling his hands in her hair. He leans forward and kisses her, hard, lingeringly on the mouth. “I love you,” he whispers against her lips, kissing her harder.
Miss Parker shuts her eyes for a moment and smiles at Jarod. “I love you too.”
“I didn’t say it to hear it back,” he whispers. “I said it because I couldn’t stop myself.”
She nods. “I know. I’m not saying it because I think you need or want to hear it. Just because I need to say it.”
Jarod kisses her again, running his hands down her back, under her hips, lifting her and rolling onto his back, setting her down on top of him. He smiles. “Don’t want your back getting scratched up,” he murmurs softly.
Miss Parker smiles at him and kisses him. “Stop talking,” she murmurs, “and make love to me.”
Jarod smiles back and runs his hands down her ribs to her hips, hooking his fingers underneath the waist band of her panties, and pulling them down her legs. He gets them down to her thighs and places a kiss against her temple. “Little help?” he asks softly.
Miss Parker laughs a little and moves her hand down, pulling her panties off and kicking them over to the side. Jarod runs his hands back up her sides, over her breasts, cupping them for a moment, then moving back down. He slides his hands underneath his jeans, lifting his hips a little and sliding them, and his boxers down to his thighs, kicking at them until they’re off. He
quickly runs his hands up her stomach, pulling her blouse over her head and tossing it to the side. He runs his hands down the front of her skirt that’s bunched up around her waist, unbuttoning it and pushing it away from her body. Miss Parker grins and leans her head down, kissing him hard.
Jarod runs his hands down her back, underneath her hips, his thumbs running softly back and forth over her thighs. He lifts her a little and slips inside her with one, hard thrust. Miss Parker lets out a moan and leans her head back a little. She moves her hips against his, her hands moving to his hair. Jarod wraps his hands around her waist, then runs them down over
her hips, holding her against him. He lifts her up, almost completely off of him, then pushes her back down, arching his hips up and thrusting into her, hard and slow. He repeats the motion several times. Miss Parker moans and kisses him hard. She runs her hands down around his shoulders, digging her fingers into his back. Jarod moves his hands down her hips to her thighs, rubbing small circles against her skin with his thumbs while he continues to stroke, slow, hard, precise strokes.
Miss Parker moves her hips harder against his. She continues kissing him, hard, running her tongue over his lips and into his mouth. Jarod kisses her back, moving his tongue along hers, sucking her lower lip into his mouth, biting down on it gently, then licking over the small wound. He holds her hips tightly to his, and thrusts harder, faster into her. Miss Parker tightens her fingers around his shoulders. She kisses him for another moment and moves her mouth from his, kissing down his jaw to his neck. Jarod groans, whispering her name into her ear and moving his hands up and down her sides to her breasts, massaging them, still moving against her hard. Miss Parker lets out a quiet moan and continues to kiss and suck at his neck. Jarod lets go of one of her breasts, running his hand down her side to her stomach, slipping between her legs and rubbing her clit gently between his thumb and index finger.
Miss Parker lets out a loud moan, her teeth gently biting at the skin on his neck. She licks at the skin, soothing it, and runs her hands down his sides to his waist, wrapping her fingers around it. Jarod releases her breast, running his hand around her lower back, rubbing his fingers into her skin. He moves his hips against hers faster, his finger and thumb working her clit harder, quicker, keeping up the pace with his thrusts. Miss Parker tenses her body, her fingers digging into his lower back. She shuts her eyes and lets out a quiet scream against the side of his throat as her orgasm runs through her. Jarod continues to thrust into her, hard, pulling out of her about an inch, then slamming in again. Miss Parker continues shuddering a little, her orgasm prolonging. She moves her hands to the sides of his face and lifts her head, looking down at him. “You’re turn,” she murmurs.
Jarod shuts his eyes and leans his head back against the hay. He places both his hands around her hips, thrusting hard, frenzied, out of control. He bites his lip and tenses his body, letting out a low, guttural groan as he comes. Miss Parker leans her head down and kisses his lips softly. She moves her lips to his ear and nibbles on the lobe gently. “I love you,” she murmurs
in his ear.
Jarod takes a few deep, shuddering breaths, his hands firmly placed over her lower back. He licks his lips and kisses her cheek, her jaw. “I love you too,” he whispers softly. “You are everything to me.”
Miss Parker leans her head against his shoulder. “You sure know how to sweet talk a girl,” she murmurs softly.
Jarod brushes his lips over her forehead. “It’s easy to sweet talk when it’s all true,” he whispers softly.
Miss Parker squeezes her eyes shut, pushing back tears. She opens them and glances up towards the window. “I think the storm’s dying down.”
Jarod looks out the window. “I think you’re right.” He looks down into her eyes. “So,” he asks in the softest of voices, “what now?”
Miss Parker smiles a little and kisses the tip of his nose. “Well right now, I just wanna stay here for awhile. Just rest in your arms. In the morning. . . .we can flip a coin and decide which direction we go in.”
Smiling, Jarod kisses her forehead, then the top of her head. “Try to sleep,” he murmurs. “I’ll find a coin in the morning.”
She nods and lays her head back down against his shoulder. “You try and get some sleep too. I doubt either of us will be successful, but. . .”
Jarod smiles. “I will,” he promises. “As soon as I’ve stared at you long enough.” He shrugs. “A few hours. . I should be able to look away long to sleep.”
Miss Parker places a soft kiss against his chest and rubs her cheek over where she’d kissed. “Thank you Jarod,” she says in a tear laced voice.
“What for?” he asks softly, grabbing a folded up old stable blanket from on top of one of the crates and covering them with it.
She swallows and shuts her eyes. “For giving me both the strength and the answers I needed to leave.”
Jarod takes a deep, shuddering breath, running his hands up down her back underneath the blanket. “Two way street, my Love,” he whispers softly against the top of her head. “You live, I live. You breathe, I breathe. You’re happy, I’m happy. You’re peaceful. . .. I stop wishing for anything else.”
Miss Parker rubs her cheek against his chest, her eyes still shut. “Night Jarod,” she murmurs sleepily.
Jarod lays his head down, his cheek against the top of her head. “Sweet dreams Love,” he whispers.
The End
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
