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Chapter or Story
I don’t own the Pretender or Profiler characters. I’m merely borrowing them for my fanfic. (See previous disclaimers for more information) 2/14/0
In Pursuit Of Happiness
Part 30
by jojarod50
The Marquee Hotel
Room 629b
10:08 AM Wednesday
Jarod shifted slightly, rustling the big fluffy comforter still covering at least part of him. Slowly he began surfacing from a deep sleep, unable to open his heavy eyelids. Feeling the softness of the sheets, he smiled to himself and turned on his side, pulling the plush pillow to a more comfortable angle and allowed himself to drift back to sleep.
Major Charles left the chair he had placed near the door, and quietly exited Jarod’s room carefully closing the door behind him, so as not to make a sound.
*
“I think he’s starting to wake up. I need for you to come over right now. No, you’re the psychiatrist. I want you to talk to him, as soon as he’s up. He scared the hell out of me last night,” he said lowering his voice even more. “Never mind, you can talk about that after you get here, just hurry.”
“Where did you get that, Gemini? Isn’t that one of the red books Jarod uses?” he whispered, as he neared his younger son sitting at the snack bar.
“I’m not sure. It fell on the floor, when we were trying to hold him down on the bed.”
“Can you read any of it?” the Major asked, craning his neck to get a good look at the coded pages.
“Yeah, it was easy to crack. But, I don’t know if I should tell you what it says.”
“For heaven’s sake, why not? Your brother is struggling to beat this thing. If there’s anything in there that can help…”
“This is pretty private stuff. I don’t think he wants any one to know what’s in it. I shouldn’t have been reading it in the first place,” he confessed, as he scooted off the barstool and headed toward his room.
“Where are you going?”
“To put it in my room, until I get a chance to put it back.
*
Room 629b
The pretender rolled over on his back and took a deep breath, letting it out slowly, as he opened his eyes. He felt so relaxed, it felt like he was floating on air.
As his eyes adjusted, he took in the luxurious room, a far cry from all the rat holes he used as hiding places while on the run from the Centre.
Still feeling incredibly groggy, he stretched for a moment and then slowly sat up. As his mind cleared, he remembered the horrible flashback he’d had, just after they’d gotten home.
His heart skipped a beat, as he realized his wet clothes had been replaced with dry ones and he’d somehow been put to bed. There also was a Band-Aid at the bend of his arm where the brachial artery is located. Pealing it back, his blood ran cold, as he stared at the round blackish-blue bruise.
“My God, what did I do last night?” he breathed, knowing it must have been serious and that his family knew all about it.
“Damn!” he growled, whipping his covers back and getting up too quickly. Sitting on the edge of the bed, he waited for the dizziness to pass, positive now that he’d been sedated.
*
Softly the door swept open and his eyes met his father’s as he entered the room.
“Jarod, do you know who I am?” he asked gently, obviously still very shook up.
“Of course I do. What’s going on? It looks like I was given an injection last night. Was I sedated?”
“Son, why don’t you get back under the covers, Agent Meisser is here and he wants to talk with you.”
Jarod frowned and slipped back into bed, trying to stay calm, as he watched his father close the door.
*
He only had to wait a few minutes, before there was a knock at the door and Agent Meisser entered the room.
“Hi, Jarod. Mind if I pull up a chair?”
“What’s going on?” the pretender asked, hating the fear in his own voice.
“Oh, I just want to talk to you for a little bit. You had a pretty hard time last night.”
“You were here? You must be the one who gave me a shot. What on earth did I do? The last thing I remember was having an insane flashback, and then, I guess, falling asleep. I don’t have them very often any more,” he added defensively. “It really took me by surprise.”
“Jarod, your dad called me at around 9:00 PM and said he had broken into your room and found you screaming hysterically and completely out of touch with reality.
By the time I arrived, he and your brother were trying to keep you from crashing through your window. It took all 3 of us to pull you down onto the bed. It was all they could do to hold you still enough so I could sedate you. You didn’t even respond to the first shot, so I had to give you two.
“No! This can’t be happening. I’m so much better now. What the hell is going on?” Jarod yelled, aborting his attempt to get out of bed as a wave of dizziness stopped him.
“Try to calm down. You’re alright now.”
“The hell I am! You just told me I tried to jump out a 6-story window last night. Oh God, isn’t this ever going to end?”
“Jarod, can you tell me about what happened to you? What you remember about your flashback?”
“It… was as if Lyle had just given me another drug overdose.
Jarod started violently shaking and struggled to breath as he began to focus on the vivid nightmare world he had been plunged into last night, remembering the panic and terror of slowly losing his mind.
“Jarod? Jarod, look at me. We don’t need to talk about this anymore right now. Why don’t you lay down and try to rest. I’ll be in to check on you in a little while.”
* * *
Room 629 moments later…
“Surely, you’re not finished talking to him already. I don’t want him left alone, unless he’s sedated.”
“Major Charles, you’re going to have to get a hold of yourself. The crisis is over. He needs a little time to collect himself, before we can go forward. I don’t want to rush him.”
“Jarod wasn’t deliberately trying to hurt himself. He was reliving a flashback last night. I think this is only the second one, where he actively participated. The other one was at Menningers Hospital when he was under an extreme amount of stress.”
“Why don’t we have some coffee and you can fill me in on anything you might have noticed that was especially stressful for him yesterday.”
“All right, but I’m not having him left alone. What if he has another flashback? Gemini, please go in and sit with your brother until the doctor sees him again. Maybe you can encourage him a little bit.”
* * *
Room 629b
“Hi, Jarod. Mind if I hang out with you for a while?”
“Gemini. I want to apologize for what I did last night. I’m so sorry. I hear I really put on quite a show,” he said, lowering his eyes.
“You want to talk about it?”
“No.”
“You’re going to have to stop hiding what’s really going on with you, if you’re serious about recovering. No one is going to be able to help you effectively, until you tell them what’s going on in your head.”
Jarod’s eyes narrowed, as he quickly reached down under the mattress and came up empty.
Turning back to Gemini, he closed his eyes when he saw his younger self holding his red notebook.
“You liked that one?” he said through clinched teeth, as he left his bed and pulled out his travel bag, throwing it at his brother’s feet. “Why don’t you look in there for the pad I used at the hospital. You might enjoy reading it even more.”
“Jarod, you don’t understand.”
Grabbing some clothes out of a drawer, he angrily turned his back on him and staggered to the bathroom. He slammed the door so hard, it nearly came off its hinges.”
“As Gemini stood there staring at the door, Major Charles rushed into the room.
“What’s going on in here?”
“I gave Jarod back his red notebook and he blew up. He’s in there,” he said, pointing to the bathroom. “I think he’s getting dressed.”
There were tears in Gemini’s eyes, as he walked off toward his room, completely crushed.
* * *
Major Charles returned to the other room, raking his fingers through his hair in frustration.
“I don’t think I can take much more of this. Jarod just has to get well.”
“I’m sorry. I can’t imagine what you’re going through,” Agent Meisser said sympathetically, pouring two coffees. “Do you use cream and sugar in that?”
“Oh thanks. I like mine black. Jarod’s the only one that uses that sugar. I swear he’s addicted to it.”
“Major, about Jarod. Has he been talking much about the last Centre project he was working on? I was concerned about how disturbed he was about Gemini III. If he still feels intense guilt over his involvement in the advanced cloning project, that might be contributing to his on going problems.”
“No, I don’t think he’s even given it a thought lately, considering all the other issues he’s been dealing with. He’s going to meet his mother and sister for the first time on Saturday. That’s the most important thing to him right now.
Just then, the pretender walked into the room, fully dressed, and poured himself a cup of coffee. Standing at the counter, he scooted the sugar bowl over to his mug, and spooned in about 12 teaspoons of sugar.
“I, um, I’m sorry I scared you dad. I’d forgotten how devastating a reaction I could have to a flash back. I just don’t understand. It was as if I were actually on a hallucinogen.”
“I’ve done some thinking. Maybe it would be better for everyone, if I went back to the hospital for a while longer. I thought I was better, but now…I just don’t know.”
“Jarod, I’m sure we can…”
“Excuse me, Dad, I need to go pack my bag,” Jarod said quietly, and went back to his room.
*
“Agent Meisser, is there any way Jarod can be stabilized enough to be able to stay here? Couldn’t you put him on some kind of tranquilizer or something, to keep him from having anymore flashbacks? It’s been so long. I would rather have my son here, with us, no matter how difficult it is.”
“I’m sorry. There really isn’t anything available that can prevent flashbacks, Major. But the odds are against him having another one that severe, if things can be kept low-key for him. Of course, if it does happens, he would need to be readmitted for his own good and yours.”
“Let’s just play it by ear for right now. He has a session with Dr. Green in about an hour. If Sydney finds nothing seriously wrong with him, I’d rather see him stay at home, too. It will help him more than anything, to be surrounded by loved ones, rather then alone in a sterile hospital room.”
“Why don’t you go in and tell him he can unpack. He looked terribly despondent to me. I don’t think he really wants to go.”
“Alright, if you think he’ll be safe here. You worked with him the whole time we were prisoners at the Centre. I’m willing to trust your judgement,” he said, scooting his chair back and heading for Jarod’s room.
The Agent watched him carefully, until he was out of sight. Filled with self-reproach, he reached in his pants pocket, and slipped out a small tin box. Quickly, he looked around again, to make sure no one was there to see what he was about to do.
* * *
Moments later…
Room 629b
“Excuse me a minute,” Agent Meisser said, peeking into Jarod’s room. “I need to run an errand. Why don’t you all grab a bite to eat, and I’ll pick you up, at 12:30. Glad to see you’re back on your feet.”
“That will be fine, Agent Meisser,” the pretender said, still feeling humiliated by what he had done.
“Dad, I don’t think my staying is such a good idea right now. I know Agent Meisser means well, but I don’t feel like I can trust myself anymore. Apparently, I’m not really under control yet.”
“Son, Agent Meisser was your psychiatrist. He feels confident that you’ll do fine at home and so do I. Why don’t you take your medication and we’ll have a sandwich before you go. You missed breakfast, you know. In fact, could you tell your brother it’s almost time to eat, before he gets into those Butterfingers he hid in his closet?”
“What’s the matter now? “ he asked, dismayed to see how quickly he seemed to change moods again.
“As long as I’m here, I want you both to understand that I need my privacy. I don’t want either of you going through my things any more.”
“Are you, um, talking about the red notebook?”
“Oh, you know about it, too? What did you do, read it together?”
“Of course not, Jarod. It fell on the floor last night, when we were holding you down for your shot. He looked at it and realized it was very personal and felt just horrible. He never shared any of it with me.”
“All I ever wanted, was to have a family. And now that I have one, I’m hurting everyone,” he said downcast, heading off to talk to his brother.
*
“Gemini, Dad wanted me to let you know, it’s almost time for lunch.”
“I’m not hungry.”
“Could you open the door for a minute? I promise not to bite your head off this time.”
After a long pause, his clone opened his door and peeked out.
“Gemini, I wish we could start all over again. I’m sorry I blew up at you. This hasn’t exactly been my best day,” he said, feeling terribly awkward.”
“That’s ok. I should have just slipped your notebook back under your mattress, when you weren’t there. That’s what I’d planned on doing. But, after I thought about it, I decided you might want to know, you have someone to talk to, who would understand.”
Jarod’s eyes softened and he smiled at his brother. “Well then, I guess you and I have a secret.”
“Two secrets. Don’t forget the candy bars.”
“I hate to break it to you, but Dad already knows about your hiding place in the closet.”
“How the heck did he find out?”
“You really don’t want to hide what you do from him, do you?”
“No, I guess not. It’s more like a game to me.”
“Come on, let’s go help Dad make some lunch.”
* * *
Red Dot Pharmaceutical Supply
***
4th floor
“I want you to keep a close eye on Meisser. He’s given us full cooperation so far, but I sense he’s having second thoughts about his new assignment. If I’m right, I want you to take over. The pretender must be prevented from compromising the project at all costs. He knows too much. We can’t afford any more interference. We’re too close to a breakthrough.”
“ Mutumbo was a fool. He and the rest of them deserved what they got. Don’t let me find myself saying the same thing about you.”
“Yes, Sir.”
* * *
St. Matthews Memorial Hospital
2:20 PM
Room 511
“You must not let this discourage you, Jarod. You’re going to get well. I know you’re concerned about last night, but you shouldn’t allow it to define your recovery.”
“It does seem rather unusual though, for you to have had such a vivid and prolonged flashback after all this time. Why don’t you sit down over here and let me examine you,” Sydney said, puzzled by this latest development.
The younger man hesitated for a moment, then stepped away from the window, took a seat next to his former mentor and allowed him to conduct a brief examination.
“Your vitals are essentially normal, but this is odd. Were you aware that your eyes are partially dilated?”
“No, I had a busy morning,” Jarod said with irritation. “ I was told by Meisser, that I was given a hefty dose of a sedative last night. I’m still feeling pretty out of it.”
“Hum, that’s probably it.”
“Jarod, I believe you’re putting yourself under far too much pressure to be well. I want you to try and be more sensitive to your own needs.”
“Choosing to go out to dinner, when you’re totally exhausted is a perfect example of not taking care of yourself. It’s all right to be honest and admit that you’d too tired and would rather stay home.”
The pretender let out a deep sigh and started studying a picture on the wall.
“I was happy to go out with them. We had a lot of fun.”
“But at what price? Jarod, you’re going to have to be careful about your stress level, for a while, and try not to over-extend yourself. Your flashback was probably the direct result of lack of sleep, the return of your memories and the major change of moving in with your family.”
“I know you greatly dislike relying on anyone other than yourself, but for right now, you’re going to have to allow your family to help you with this.”
“That just isn’t justifiable. My problems are still too severe for them to be expected to deal with,” he said, getting up and starting to pace. “I think I should get my own place for a while, until I’m really better.”
“Jarod, that’s not the answer. What if you had a son, who had been through what you have? You’d do everything in your power to help him, no matter what the personal cost. The same principle applies for the other members of your family.”
“I’d rather not discuss this any more.”
“I see,” Sydney said, carefully studying his body language and tone of voice. “Perhaps, you would rather explore what happened to you during your drug overdose? I believe it’s important for you to start sharing your experiences, now that your memories have surfaced. As you probably already know, the more you talk about them, the less overwhelming they will become.”
The pretender fell silent, lost in thought. Eventually, he walked back over to the window, swallowing bile.
“I don’t think I can talk about it yet.”
“All right, Jarod, I’m not trying to rush you. You take all the time you need. One thing I do want you to realize is that you already survived the drug overdose. All you’ll be dealing with now, are the memories. I know they are still frightening, but what happened is in the past.”
Deliberately keeping his back to him, the pretender allowed himself to reveal his deepest fear.
“I wish I’d never remembered the drug overdose at all. I’m terrified that it’s just a matter of time before I totally lose my mind. Every time I start thinking about it, I feel like my mind is in danger of slipping away. I’m not even sure I could survive another flashback like the one I had last night.”
“I’m so sorry, Jarod. Please come over here and sit down. We need to talk about this.”
* * *
Marquee Hotel
Room 629
5:00 PM
“Jarod, I’m glad you’re back. How did everything go?” Major Charles asked, noticing his new haircut right away.
“Fine, Dad. Better than I ever would have expected.”
“ I stopped by and got a haircut, on my way home. I can’t believe how long it had gotten. It sure is a beautiful day for a walk.”
“I thought Agent Meisser was bringing you home.”
“I decided, I wanted some exercise,” he said, reaching in his pocket for his Spiderman dispenser and popping a Pez. “Where’s Gemini? I bought some magazines and joke books from a little shop on the end of the block. Do you think he’s familiar with Far Side jokes? They’re really good.”
“I don’t think so, Jarod. He’s in his bedroom right now. Why don’t you surprise him? We’re going to go out to dinner in about an hour. That will give you two plenty of time to check them out.”
“Oh, I’m sorry, I forgot to tell you. I’m going out to dinner with Miss Parker tonight. I should have told you earlier, but with everything that went on this morning, it just slipped my mind. I hope you don’t mind.”
“No, Jarod. That will be fine,” he said, trying to hide his disappointment. It was obvious, that the heated discussion he’d had with his son last night, was a waste of time.
“Thanks, Dad,” Jarod said, heading off down the hallway, not surprised that he wasn’t exactly thrilled, but grateful he’d kept his thoughts to himself this time.
* * *
Marquee Hotel
Room 626
6:30 PM
“Well, hello, handsome. Are you always this prompt?” she teased, enjoying the confused expression on his face. “Come on in. I’m almost ready,” she said, giving him a flirtatious once over. “Love the hair cut,” she said in a sultry voice, closing the door and leaning against it, seductively.
“You look beautiful, tonight, Parker, “ Jarod said, totally smitten with her, drinking in her pale blue eyes. Reaching out, he pulled her into a strong embrace, and gave her a deep passionate kiss.
“Just let me hold you, for a moment,” he breathed, his voice betraying his deep desire for her. “I’ve missed you so much. I never want to leave you again,” he whispered, as he kissed her more intensely, pressing her closer to himself, thrilled by her passionate response.
Breathing heavily, he gently released his hold on her and took a small step back, seemingly becoming unsure of himself.
Parker smiled at him reassuringly, realizing he was uncharacteristically at a loss for words, as he stood there weighing the repercussions of what he was about to say.
“I think you know I love you, Parker. I’m not totally on my feet yet, but I’m really doing better. I hope you don’t think, I’m jumping the gun, but…will you marry me?”
“This is crazy, Jarod. I don’t know what to say.”
“I wish you hadn’t put it quite that way,” he said, nervously studying her with his innocent big brown eyes.
“Jarod, I would be honored to be your wife,” she whispered, knowing she could never love another man, the way she loved him. “I had no idea you’re such an old-fashioned kind of guy,” she teased, grinning at him with a sparkle in her eye.
Obviously very relieved, Jarod slipped a small velvet box out of his suit coat, and removed an eloquent diamond engagement ring.
“I want you to have this, as a token of my love for you. If things don’t work out, I want you to keep it always, as a reminder of how much I love you. Later, we can retrieve you great grandmother’s wedding ring.”
“Jarod, this is beautiful,” she said, breathlessly, stunned by his lavish tastes in jewelry.
“Here, let me place it on your hand,” he said, gently reaching for it and slipping the ring on her delicate finger
Then drawing her into another embrace, he kissed her longingly, unwilling to let her go.
“Maybe we should eat later on, Jarod,” Miss Parker said, trying to catch her breath.
As he pulled away, she could have sworn she saw him blush slightly.
“We better not, Parker. I already have reservations and Agent Meisser is waiting down stairs,” he said, giving her an apologetic look.
“All right, Jarod, but you know what you are? You’re nothing but a big tease,” she said, trying to keep a straight face, breathing quite heavily herself.
“Oh, is that what you think,” he chuckled, popping his eyebrows up and down with an evil grin. “Finish up what ever you need to. I’ll be waiting for you right here.”
* * *
A.T.F. Headquarters
Atlanta, Georgia
6:30 PM
“Bailey, take a look at this,” George said, scratching his head.
“What do you have, George? Make it quick, I’m already late for an appointment.”
“You’re not going to believe this. There’ve been several items down-loaded from the secured Centre evidence files. Who ever did this was really slick. I’m not sure when it was done, but I do know that they compromised all the files pertaining to a project coded Gemini III.”
Part 30
by jojarod50
The Marquee Hotel
Room 629b
10:08 AM Wednesday
Jarod shifted slightly, rustling the big fluffy comforter still covering at least part of him. Slowly he began surfacing from a deep sleep, unable to open his heavy eyelids. Feeling the softness of the sheets, he smiled to himself and turned on his side, pulling the plush pillow to a more comfortable angle and allowed himself to drift back to sleep.
Major Charles left the chair he had placed near the door, and quietly exited Jarod’s room carefully closing the door behind him, so as not to make a sound.
*
“I think he’s starting to wake up. I need for you to come over right now. No, you’re the psychiatrist. I want you to talk to him, as soon as he’s up. He scared the hell out of me last night,” he said lowering his voice even more. “Never mind, you can talk about that after you get here, just hurry.”
“Where did you get that, Gemini? Isn’t that one of the red books Jarod uses?” he whispered, as he neared his younger son sitting at the snack bar.
“I’m not sure. It fell on the floor, when we were trying to hold him down on the bed.”
“Can you read any of it?” the Major asked, craning his neck to get a good look at the coded pages.
“Yeah, it was easy to crack. But, I don’t know if I should tell you what it says.”
“For heaven’s sake, why not? Your brother is struggling to beat this thing. If there’s anything in there that can help…”
“This is pretty private stuff. I don’t think he wants any one to know what’s in it. I shouldn’t have been reading it in the first place,” he confessed, as he scooted off the barstool and headed toward his room.
“Where are you going?”
“To put it in my room, until I get a chance to put it back.
*
Room 629b
The pretender rolled over on his back and took a deep breath, letting it out slowly, as he opened his eyes. He felt so relaxed, it felt like he was floating on air.
As his eyes adjusted, he took in the luxurious room, a far cry from all the rat holes he used as hiding places while on the run from the Centre.
Still feeling incredibly groggy, he stretched for a moment and then slowly sat up. As his mind cleared, he remembered the horrible flashback he’d had, just after they’d gotten home.
His heart skipped a beat, as he realized his wet clothes had been replaced with dry ones and he’d somehow been put to bed. There also was a Band-Aid at the bend of his arm where the brachial artery is located. Pealing it back, his blood ran cold, as he stared at the round blackish-blue bruise.
“My God, what did I do last night?” he breathed, knowing it must have been serious and that his family knew all about it.
“Damn!” he growled, whipping his covers back and getting up too quickly. Sitting on the edge of the bed, he waited for the dizziness to pass, positive now that he’d been sedated.
*
Softly the door swept open and his eyes met his father’s as he entered the room.
“Jarod, do you know who I am?” he asked gently, obviously still very shook up.
“Of course I do. What’s going on? It looks like I was given an injection last night. Was I sedated?”
“Son, why don’t you get back under the covers, Agent Meisser is here and he wants to talk with you.”
Jarod frowned and slipped back into bed, trying to stay calm, as he watched his father close the door.
*
He only had to wait a few minutes, before there was a knock at the door and Agent Meisser entered the room.
“Hi, Jarod. Mind if I pull up a chair?”
“What’s going on?” the pretender asked, hating the fear in his own voice.
“Oh, I just want to talk to you for a little bit. You had a pretty hard time last night.”
“You were here? You must be the one who gave me a shot. What on earth did I do? The last thing I remember was having an insane flashback, and then, I guess, falling asleep. I don’t have them very often any more,” he added defensively. “It really took me by surprise.”
“Jarod, your dad called me at around 9:00 PM and said he had broken into your room and found you screaming hysterically and completely out of touch with reality.
By the time I arrived, he and your brother were trying to keep you from crashing through your window. It took all 3 of us to pull you down onto the bed. It was all they could do to hold you still enough so I could sedate you. You didn’t even respond to the first shot, so I had to give you two.
“No! This can’t be happening. I’m so much better now. What the hell is going on?” Jarod yelled, aborting his attempt to get out of bed as a wave of dizziness stopped him.
“Try to calm down. You’re alright now.”
“The hell I am! You just told me I tried to jump out a 6-story window last night. Oh God, isn’t this ever going to end?”
“Jarod, can you tell me about what happened to you? What you remember about your flashback?”
“It… was as if Lyle had just given me another drug overdose.
Jarod started violently shaking and struggled to breath as he began to focus on the vivid nightmare world he had been plunged into last night, remembering the panic and terror of slowly losing his mind.
“Jarod? Jarod, look at me. We don’t need to talk about this anymore right now. Why don’t you lay down and try to rest. I’ll be in to check on you in a little while.”
* * *
Room 629 moments later…
“Surely, you’re not finished talking to him already. I don’t want him left alone, unless he’s sedated.”
“Major Charles, you’re going to have to get a hold of yourself. The crisis is over. He needs a little time to collect himself, before we can go forward. I don’t want to rush him.”
“Jarod wasn’t deliberately trying to hurt himself. He was reliving a flashback last night. I think this is only the second one, where he actively participated. The other one was at Menningers Hospital when he was under an extreme amount of stress.”
“Why don’t we have some coffee and you can fill me in on anything you might have noticed that was especially stressful for him yesterday.”
“All right, but I’m not having him left alone. What if he has another flashback? Gemini, please go in and sit with your brother until the doctor sees him again. Maybe you can encourage him a little bit.”
* * *
Room 629b
“Hi, Jarod. Mind if I hang out with you for a while?”
“Gemini. I want to apologize for what I did last night. I’m so sorry. I hear I really put on quite a show,” he said, lowering his eyes.
“You want to talk about it?”
“No.”
“You’re going to have to stop hiding what’s really going on with you, if you’re serious about recovering. No one is going to be able to help you effectively, until you tell them what’s going on in your head.”
Jarod’s eyes narrowed, as he quickly reached down under the mattress and came up empty.
Turning back to Gemini, he closed his eyes when he saw his younger self holding his red notebook.
“You liked that one?” he said through clinched teeth, as he left his bed and pulled out his travel bag, throwing it at his brother’s feet. “Why don’t you look in there for the pad I used at the hospital. You might enjoy reading it even more.”
“Jarod, you don’t understand.”
Grabbing some clothes out of a drawer, he angrily turned his back on him and staggered to the bathroom. He slammed the door so hard, it nearly came off its hinges.”
“As Gemini stood there staring at the door, Major Charles rushed into the room.
“What’s going on in here?”
“I gave Jarod back his red notebook and he blew up. He’s in there,” he said, pointing to the bathroom. “I think he’s getting dressed.”
There were tears in Gemini’s eyes, as he walked off toward his room, completely crushed.
* * *
Major Charles returned to the other room, raking his fingers through his hair in frustration.
“I don’t think I can take much more of this. Jarod just has to get well.”
“I’m sorry. I can’t imagine what you’re going through,” Agent Meisser said sympathetically, pouring two coffees. “Do you use cream and sugar in that?”
“Oh thanks. I like mine black. Jarod’s the only one that uses that sugar. I swear he’s addicted to it.”
“Major, about Jarod. Has he been talking much about the last Centre project he was working on? I was concerned about how disturbed he was about Gemini III. If he still feels intense guilt over his involvement in the advanced cloning project, that might be contributing to his on going problems.”
“No, I don’t think he’s even given it a thought lately, considering all the other issues he’s been dealing with. He’s going to meet his mother and sister for the first time on Saturday. That’s the most important thing to him right now.
Just then, the pretender walked into the room, fully dressed, and poured himself a cup of coffee. Standing at the counter, he scooted the sugar bowl over to his mug, and spooned in about 12 teaspoons of sugar.
“I, um, I’m sorry I scared you dad. I’d forgotten how devastating a reaction I could have to a flash back. I just don’t understand. It was as if I were actually on a hallucinogen.”
“I’ve done some thinking. Maybe it would be better for everyone, if I went back to the hospital for a while longer. I thought I was better, but now…I just don’t know.”
“Jarod, I’m sure we can…”
“Excuse me, Dad, I need to go pack my bag,” Jarod said quietly, and went back to his room.
*
“Agent Meisser, is there any way Jarod can be stabilized enough to be able to stay here? Couldn’t you put him on some kind of tranquilizer or something, to keep him from having anymore flashbacks? It’s been so long. I would rather have my son here, with us, no matter how difficult it is.”
“I’m sorry. There really isn’t anything available that can prevent flashbacks, Major. But the odds are against him having another one that severe, if things can be kept low-key for him. Of course, if it does happens, he would need to be readmitted for his own good and yours.”
“Let’s just play it by ear for right now. He has a session with Dr. Green in about an hour. If Sydney finds nothing seriously wrong with him, I’d rather see him stay at home, too. It will help him more than anything, to be surrounded by loved ones, rather then alone in a sterile hospital room.”
“Why don’t you go in and tell him he can unpack. He looked terribly despondent to me. I don’t think he really wants to go.”
“Alright, if you think he’ll be safe here. You worked with him the whole time we were prisoners at the Centre. I’m willing to trust your judgement,” he said, scooting his chair back and heading for Jarod’s room.
The Agent watched him carefully, until he was out of sight. Filled with self-reproach, he reached in his pants pocket, and slipped out a small tin box. Quickly, he looked around again, to make sure no one was there to see what he was about to do.
* * *
Moments later…
Room 629b
“Excuse me a minute,” Agent Meisser said, peeking into Jarod’s room. “I need to run an errand. Why don’t you all grab a bite to eat, and I’ll pick you up, at 12:30. Glad to see you’re back on your feet.”
“That will be fine, Agent Meisser,” the pretender said, still feeling humiliated by what he had done.
“Dad, I don’t think my staying is such a good idea right now. I know Agent Meisser means well, but I don’t feel like I can trust myself anymore. Apparently, I’m not really under control yet.”
“Son, Agent Meisser was your psychiatrist. He feels confident that you’ll do fine at home and so do I. Why don’t you take your medication and we’ll have a sandwich before you go. You missed breakfast, you know. In fact, could you tell your brother it’s almost time to eat, before he gets into those Butterfingers he hid in his closet?”
“What’s the matter now? “ he asked, dismayed to see how quickly he seemed to change moods again.
“As long as I’m here, I want you both to understand that I need my privacy. I don’t want either of you going through my things any more.”
“Are you, um, talking about the red notebook?”
“Oh, you know about it, too? What did you do, read it together?”
“Of course not, Jarod. It fell on the floor last night, when we were holding you down for your shot. He looked at it and realized it was very personal and felt just horrible. He never shared any of it with me.”
“All I ever wanted, was to have a family. And now that I have one, I’m hurting everyone,” he said downcast, heading off to talk to his brother.
*
“Gemini, Dad wanted me to let you know, it’s almost time for lunch.”
“I’m not hungry.”
“Could you open the door for a minute? I promise not to bite your head off this time.”
After a long pause, his clone opened his door and peeked out.
“Gemini, I wish we could start all over again. I’m sorry I blew up at you. This hasn’t exactly been my best day,” he said, feeling terribly awkward.”
“That’s ok. I should have just slipped your notebook back under your mattress, when you weren’t there. That’s what I’d planned on doing. But, after I thought about it, I decided you might want to know, you have someone to talk to, who would understand.”
Jarod’s eyes softened and he smiled at his brother. “Well then, I guess you and I have a secret.”
“Two secrets. Don’t forget the candy bars.”
“I hate to break it to you, but Dad already knows about your hiding place in the closet.”
“How the heck did he find out?”
“You really don’t want to hide what you do from him, do you?”
“No, I guess not. It’s more like a game to me.”
“Come on, let’s go help Dad make some lunch.”
* * *
Red Dot Pharmaceutical Supply
***
4th floor
“I want you to keep a close eye on Meisser. He’s given us full cooperation so far, but I sense he’s having second thoughts about his new assignment. If I’m right, I want you to take over. The pretender must be prevented from compromising the project at all costs. He knows too much. We can’t afford any more interference. We’re too close to a breakthrough.”
“ Mutumbo was a fool. He and the rest of them deserved what they got. Don’t let me find myself saying the same thing about you.”
“Yes, Sir.”
* * *
St. Matthews Memorial Hospital
2:20 PM
Room 511
“You must not let this discourage you, Jarod. You’re going to get well. I know you’re concerned about last night, but you shouldn’t allow it to define your recovery.”
“It does seem rather unusual though, for you to have had such a vivid and prolonged flashback after all this time. Why don’t you sit down over here and let me examine you,” Sydney said, puzzled by this latest development.
The younger man hesitated for a moment, then stepped away from the window, took a seat next to his former mentor and allowed him to conduct a brief examination.
“Your vitals are essentially normal, but this is odd. Were you aware that your eyes are partially dilated?”
“No, I had a busy morning,” Jarod said with irritation. “ I was told by Meisser, that I was given a hefty dose of a sedative last night. I’m still feeling pretty out of it.”
“Hum, that’s probably it.”
“Jarod, I believe you’re putting yourself under far too much pressure to be well. I want you to try and be more sensitive to your own needs.”
“Choosing to go out to dinner, when you’re totally exhausted is a perfect example of not taking care of yourself. It’s all right to be honest and admit that you’d too tired and would rather stay home.”
The pretender let out a deep sigh and started studying a picture on the wall.
“I was happy to go out with them. We had a lot of fun.”
“But at what price? Jarod, you’re going to have to be careful about your stress level, for a while, and try not to over-extend yourself. Your flashback was probably the direct result of lack of sleep, the return of your memories and the major change of moving in with your family.”
“I know you greatly dislike relying on anyone other than yourself, but for right now, you’re going to have to allow your family to help you with this.”
“That just isn’t justifiable. My problems are still too severe for them to be expected to deal with,” he said, getting up and starting to pace. “I think I should get my own place for a while, until I’m really better.”
“Jarod, that’s not the answer. What if you had a son, who had been through what you have? You’d do everything in your power to help him, no matter what the personal cost. The same principle applies for the other members of your family.”
“I’d rather not discuss this any more.”
“I see,” Sydney said, carefully studying his body language and tone of voice. “Perhaps, you would rather explore what happened to you during your drug overdose? I believe it’s important for you to start sharing your experiences, now that your memories have surfaced. As you probably already know, the more you talk about them, the less overwhelming they will become.”
The pretender fell silent, lost in thought. Eventually, he walked back over to the window, swallowing bile.
“I don’t think I can talk about it yet.”
“All right, Jarod, I’m not trying to rush you. You take all the time you need. One thing I do want you to realize is that you already survived the drug overdose. All you’ll be dealing with now, are the memories. I know they are still frightening, but what happened is in the past.”
Deliberately keeping his back to him, the pretender allowed himself to reveal his deepest fear.
“I wish I’d never remembered the drug overdose at all. I’m terrified that it’s just a matter of time before I totally lose my mind. Every time I start thinking about it, I feel like my mind is in danger of slipping away. I’m not even sure I could survive another flashback like the one I had last night.”
“I’m so sorry, Jarod. Please come over here and sit down. We need to talk about this.”
* * *
Marquee Hotel
Room 629
5:00 PM
“Jarod, I’m glad you’re back. How did everything go?” Major Charles asked, noticing his new haircut right away.
“Fine, Dad. Better than I ever would have expected.”
“ I stopped by and got a haircut, on my way home. I can’t believe how long it had gotten. It sure is a beautiful day for a walk.”
“I thought Agent Meisser was bringing you home.”
“I decided, I wanted some exercise,” he said, reaching in his pocket for his Spiderman dispenser and popping a Pez. “Where’s Gemini? I bought some magazines and joke books from a little shop on the end of the block. Do you think he’s familiar with Far Side jokes? They’re really good.”
“I don’t think so, Jarod. He’s in his bedroom right now. Why don’t you surprise him? We’re going to go out to dinner in about an hour. That will give you two plenty of time to check them out.”
“Oh, I’m sorry, I forgot to tell you. I’m going out to dinner with Miss Parker tonight. I should have told you earlier, but with everything that went on this morning, it just slipped my mind. I hope you don’t mind.”
“No, Jarod. That will be fine,” he said, trying to hide his disappointment. It was obvious, that the heated discussion he’d had with his son last night, was a waste of time.
“Thanks, Dad,” Jarod said, heading off down the hallway, not surprised that he wasn’t exactly thrilled, but grateful he’d kept his thoughts to himself this time.
* * *
Marquee Hotel
Room 626
6:30 PM
“Well, hello, handsome. Are you always this prompt?” she teased, enjoying the confused expression on his face. “Come on in. I’m almost ready,” she said, giving him a flirtatious once over. “Love the hair cut,” she said in a sultry voice, closing the door and leaning against it, seductively.
“You look beautiful, tonight, Parker, “ Jarod said, totally smitten with her, drinking in her pale blue eyes. Reaching out, he pulled her into a strong embrace, and gave her a deep passionate kiss.
“Just let me hold you, for a moment,” he breathed, his voice betraying his deep desire for her. “I’ve missed you so much. I never want to leave you again,” he whispered, as he kissed her more intensely, pressing her closer to himself, thrilled by her passionate response.
Breathing heavily, he gently released his hold on her and took a small step back, seemingly becoming unsure of himself.
Parker smiled at him reassuringly, realizing he was uncharacteristically at a loss for words, as he stood there weighing the repercussions of what he was about to say.
“I think you know I love you, Parker. I’m not totally on my feet yet, but I’m really doing better. I hope you don’t think, I’m jumping the gun, but…will you marry me?”
“This is crazy, Jarod. I don’t know what to say.”
“I wish you hadn’t put it quite that way,” he said, nervously studying her with his innocent big brown eyes.
“Jarod, I would be honored to be your wife,” she whispered, knowing she could never love another man, the way she loved him. “I had no idea you’re such an old-fashioned kind of guy,” she teased, grinning at him with a sparkle in her eye.
Obviously very relieved, Jarod slipped a small velvet box out of his suit coat, and removed an eloquent diamond engagement ring.
“I want you to have this, as a token of my love for you. If things don’t work out, I want you to keep it always, as a reminder of how much I love you. Later, we can retrieve you great grandmother’s wedding ring.”
“Jarod, this is beautiful,” she said, breathlessly, stunned by his lavish tastes in jewelry.
“Here, let me place it on your hand,” he said, gently reaching for it and slipping the ring on her delicate finger
Then drawing her into another embrace, he kissed her longingly, unwilling to let her go.
“Maybe we should eat later on, Jarod,” Miss Parker said, trying to catch her breath.
As he pulled away, she could have sworn she saw him blush slightly.
“We better not, Parker. I already have reservations and Agent Meisser is waiting down stairs,” he said, giving her an apologetic look.
“All right, Jarod, but you know what you are? You’re nothing but a big tease,” she said, trying to keep a straight face, breathing quite heavily herself.
“Oh, is that what you think,” he chuckled, popping his eyebrows up and down with an evil grin. “Finish up what ever you need to. I’ll be waiting for you right here.”
* * *
A.T.F. Headquarters
Atlanta, Georgia
6:30 PM
“Bailey, take a look at this,” George said, scratching his head.
“What do you have, George? Make it quick, I’m already late for an appointment.”
“You’re not going to believe this. There’ve been several items down-loaded from the secured Centre evidence files. Who ever did this was really slick. I’m not sure when it was done, but I do know that they compromised all the files pertaining to a project coded Gemini III.”
