I can never forgive them for what they did to my boy. Dragging Jarod in like a convict to a torture chamber, like an animal to a slaughterhouse. Strapping him down as he fought and screamed. Watching his frenzied panic. Killing him. Over and over. He could have been dead when I returned from Europe. Instead he was so traumatized he suppressed his memories, then later, when hit with death, he suffered nightmares and flashbacks. I can never forgive them for what they did to my boy.

            Can I ever forgive myself for what I did to my boy?