You must login (register) to review.
Title: Chapter 9 - Waiting is coming to an end

Hi just read your story it was very good.

 Reviewer: Katescats Anonymous starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 02/02/14 07:51 am
Title: Chapter 9 - Waiting is coming to an end

Great story, please continue!

 Reviewer: Leonie1988 Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 04/11/13 01:54 pm
Title: Chapter 9 - Waiting is coming to an end

Great job!  Can't wait for more, to find out what this 'son and daughter' part is all about, and see Jarod and Miss Parker reunited.  I hope Angelo and Debbie continue to have prominent roles, I think they're my favorite characters in this story.  Although I like that Jay's there, too.  =)  I hope Broots recovers from learning about Debbie and the Centre.  LOL

 Reviewer: DanielleSmiley-Face Anonymous starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 21/02/10 08:20 am
Title: Chapter 6 - Well Who Do We Have Here

Aww, my favorite chapter so far!  I love how Debbie and Angelo were secret friends this whole time. 

 Reviewer: DanielleSmiley-Face Anonymous [Report This]
Date: 21/02/10 08:10 am
Title: Chapter 3 - Broots’s change of Life

Haha, love that last paragraph!  =)

 Reviewer: DanielleSmiley-Face Anonymous [Report This]
Date: 21/02/10 08:02 am
Title: Chapter 9 - Waiting is coming to an end

This story is great, keep it going!  I want to know what happens next

 Reviewer: Mary Anonymous [Report This]
Date: 24/06/09 06:52 pm
Title: Chapter 8 - Who is Protecting Who

I'm glad that Miss Parker is going to tell Jarod the truth. Please update soon.

 Reviewer: Ann Anonymous starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 02/10/08 06:39 am
Title: Chapter 9 - Waiting is coming to an end

Nicely done, I'm looking forward to see what happens. I love the twists and turns you managed to write. I can't wait to see what the next chapter will reveal.

 Reviewer: nightowl Anonymous starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 25/03/08 11:55 am
Title: Chapter 9 - Waiting is coming to an end

Wonderful story, update soon. ;)

 Reviewer: Sango2 Anonymous starstarstarstarhalf-star [Report This]
Date: 25/03/08 02:25 am
Title: Chapter 9 - Waiting is coming to an end

Oooo I can't wait! I hope you update this soon

 Reviewer: Courtneyhawk Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 24/03/08 04:28 pm
Title: Chapter 1 - The World Has Changed

Love it! want more ;D

 Reviewer: Courtneyhawk Signed [Report This]
Date: 23/03/08 06:26 pm
Title: Chapter 8 - Who is Protecting Who

You are moving things along at an even pace. Keep it going. I'm right with you waiting to find out where things are leading to.  You are leaving enough clues and history to the story to keep me with you...waiting!

 Good work. Keep writing.



Author's Response:

 thanks

It is nice to hear 

 Reviewer: nightowl Anonymous starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 23/03/08 09:48 am
Title: Chapter 7 - What to do

wow, this chapter is a surprise.I had hoped she was still alive, but alive and pregnant!  Let's hope she makes the right decison, of course only you know what that is! according to how your story goes!

 

Of course I'll be waiting to find out the answer. Please keep writing. 



Author's Response:

right now not even I know what she is going to decide so as soon as a flash of thought comes I will be writting the next chapter

There is so much to decide on

 

I am glad you are enjoying it 

 Reviewer: nightowl Anonymous starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 22/03/08 01:36 pm
Title: Chapter 6 - Well Who Do We Have Here

Keep the chapter(s) coming, still got my interest. ;)

 Reviewer: Sango2 Anonymous starstarstarstarhalf-star [Report This]
Date: 17/03/08 02:47 am
Title: Chapter 6 - Well Who Do We Have Here

Very interesting twist, unique and well done.  I'll be looking for the next one to enjoy just as much. 

 

Good work on the plot and the telling. 



Author's Response: I am glad you are enjoying it. 

Reviewer: nightowl Anonymous starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 16/03/08 05:41 pm
Title: Chapter 5 - Hello Jarod, Long Time No See

YEAH!!! Miss Parker is back!!! Can't wait for the next chapter!

I noticed that when you write, some of the sentences are a little awkward. Could be good to have someone look at the story before you post. Other than that, I find your story very fascinating:)



Author's Response:

But is she?

You will have to read the next chapter to find out 

 Reviewer: anamchara Anonymous [Report This]
Date: 15/03/08 12:38 pm
Title: Chapter 4 - A Lot Can Change In Six Months

Very well done. You have done a good job of adding more description to your story. You are telling an interesting story I know I'm looking forward to seeing what happens next.

 

Thanks for continuing the story. 

 Reviewer: nightowl Anonymous starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: 12/03/08 10:51 am
Title: Chapter 3 - Broots’s change of Life

Great!! Definitively not the story I though I read!!

 

Keep writing!!

 Reviewer: Kenny Anonymous starstarstarstarhalf-star [Report This]
Date: 10/03/08 09:43 am
Title: Chapter 1 - The World Has Changed

Funny how that happens, some chapters nearly write themselves and others you struggle with and are never really happy with how they turn out.

You are doing fine,keeping everyone interested without giving too much  away as to what is really going on. Again my only suggestion is try and add more description, like was Broots trembling while holding the gun or maybe he had a firm grip on it. Or the expression on his face. Little things will help put on right there in the story. It's not easy but start out with simple things and you may find it comes easier to you.

 

Keep writing.. you have everyone interested in where you are going with it. Thanks for sharing your story. 



Author's Response:

Thanks for the tips

 

 Reviewer: nightowl Anonymous starstarstarstarhalf-star [Report This]
Date: 09/03/08 09:43 am
Title: Chapter 3 - Broots’s change of Life

That's really good! I like the changes and the fact that Jarod is so lost. And Broots... I can't wait to read the next chapter and hopefully to see a very agressive Broots!!! But if he's protecting Miss Parker, we all know Broots can be really overprotective with her and be a different man, and that's why it's so cute!! Carry on like that! (and thank you for updating so quickly!)

Author's Response: I am glad you are enjoying it.  I have always felt that Broots was tougher than he looked and I just wanted to show that

 Reviewer: Faith Parker Anonymous [Report This]
Date: 09/03/08 05:24 am
Title: Chapter 2 - What to do when the world has changed.

Nice twist in the story, it works well to keep the reader going. Keep writing, you're doing fine.

Author's Response: Thanks, it might take a little while for the next couple of chapters.  I have to plann where they are going a bit.  The last too just came to me.

 Reviewer: nightowl Anonymous starstarstarstarhalf-star [Report This]
Date: 08/03/08 03:58 pm
Title: Chapter 2 - What to do when the world has changed.

nice sequel and more mysteries!

This chapter is all new for me, so I must be mistaking your story with another which was speaking of Jarod's return and burned Parker's house, but I'm sorry I don't remember the title neither the author!



Author's Response: Thanks, its nice to know that I am going some where different

 Reviewer: Kenny Anonymous [Report This]
Date: 08/03/08 01:12 pm
Title: Chapter 1 - The World Has Changed

Hmmm, interested to see where you'll take this. Looking forward to more.

Author's Response: Thank you,

Reviewer: whashaza Anonymous [Report This]
Date: 08/03/08 10:41 am
Title: Chapter 1 - The World Has Changed

Love it, please continue. ;)

Author's Response: Thank you, I will try.  But as I am not a writter by trade or even by hope, you will have to bear with me

 Reviewer: Sango2 Anonymous starstarstarstarhalf-star [Report This]
Date: 08/03/08 07:31 am
Title: Chapter 1 - The World Has Changed

Oh you have my interest! Very intriguing, I shall look forward to chapter # 2!

Author's Response: Thank you - I will get it out as soon as I can

 Reviewer: KatieQ Signed [Report This]
Date: 07/03/08 09:08 pm
You must login (register) to review.